A short lesson on getting what you want in 6 pictures.

Our two cats, Cuddles and Jasper, are reluctant housemates. At best they tolerate each other’s company when it’s absolutely necessary. Such as in the morning when breakfast is served in side-by-side dishes or when the sun is shining through the doorwall making for excellent solar recharging opportunities or even when there is a noise outside and the front window is the only good spot to investigate it. Otherwise they don’t like to share things. Cuddles, for example, has laid claim to our king size bed. If he’s on it then Jasper will generally demur and go elsewhere.

The basement tends to be Jasper’s domain and when I’m on the computer he can often be found curled up in the kitty bed sleeping. Cuddles used to dominate my computer time back when we were in the apartment and my setup was in the second bedroom and he often looks put out when he comes downstairs and sees that Jasper has claimed the kitty bed. Every now and then, though, he gets an opportunity to hang out with me and claim the bed for his own. Jasper, being a master of logic and reason, will sometimes have to convince Cuddles that it’s Jasper’s turn to sleep in the kitty bed. Here is how he accomplishes that goal:

First, establish what it is you want.
You may find someone has already laid claim to your objective and may complain that “they were here first.”

Gently explain to them why they should shut the fuck up and get out of your spot.
“Fuck you, I’m not moving.”
Claim victory via calm reasoning and superior argument.
Relax in your newly claimed objective.

There is little need to resort to (much) violence when you have a well-reasoned argument in favor of your position. We could all learn a lesson or two from this.

Jasper doesn’t appreciate your sniffles.

Our emergency backup cat, Jasper, gets really upset whenever someone sneezes in his presence. Normally he’s not very vocal, but he’ll bitch up a storm if you sneeze and he’ll grumble if you sniffle. I’ve been trying to catch this on video for some time now and I’ve finally got a little footage of it, though he’s much more subdued than usual in this clip.

He’s hard to hear in this, but you can see he’s vocalizing and getting annoyed with my sniffles. At the end he’s figured out that I’m faking my sneezes to get him to react.

There have been occasions where I’ve been in the basement and sneezed and he’s run down the stairs from the main floor just to bitch at me about sneezing. He also tends to get upset when I get frustrated with a video game and let a cuss word fly. It’s hard to catch it on video because by the time I realize I’m about to sneeze I’ve already done so and the moment has passed. I’ll try to get a better clip in the future.

How I know when Anne is making my lunch for the day.

Anne is gracious enough to make me my lunch every morning. This is always a time of great anticipation and excitement for the cats. In this pic Jasper is being way more patient than usual as he often will stand on his hind legs next to Anne to try and see what’s going on. Cuddles, on the other hand, always sits in the same spot and is very patient in his wait to see if perhaps Anne might leave a bit of sliced ham or turkey in their food dishes.

Yes, they’re a little spoiled.

That’s no ornament. It’s a space station!

I had a vacation day yesterday and we decided we should go up to see my folks because we didn’t get a chance to do so over Thanksgiving. As I’m sitting on the couch putting my shoes on to leave I head a rustling in the Christmas tree next to me. We had set it up last weekend and gotten the lights on it, but still haven’t put the ornaments on. This hasn’t stopped the official SEB cats from falling in love with it as the tree skirt is apparently very comfortable. Jasper, in particular, loves playing with the fake berries and pine cones that decorate some of the lower branches. So I looked over to see what they were doing in case one of them was chewing on a branch which they know they’re not supposed to do and I didn’t see any cats under the tree.

Then I looked up:

What the hell?

Jasper is only a year and a half or so old and in that time he shot up from a kitten I could literally hold in the palm of my hand to a 15 pound adult cat. He’s bigger than Cuddles who has at least a year on him in age. Last year when he first experienced the Christmas tree he climbed it several times. Apparently he doesn’t realize he’s not a little kitten anymore.

It was pretty clear he was having an “oh shit” moment where he realized he not only was in trouble, but he had no idea how to get down without breaking his neck. It took both Anne and I to extract him from the tree.

On the one hand I’m glad my laziness kept there from being any ornaments on the tree for him to break, on the other I’m hoping he’s had enough tree climbing adventure that he won’t feel the need to do it once we do put the ornaments on. Still, it makes for a great picture.

And now for a bit of positive cat blogging.

Given the downer nature of the last couple of entries about cats I thought I should take a moment to do a positive one.

One year ago today is when Jasper stumbled into our lives. When I brought him home he looked like this:

Today, he looks like this:

Amazing how much difference a year in a good home can make, eh? He’s grown up into a beautiful, good-natured cat who loves to talk to you whenever he gets the chance. We met by total chance and I think both of us were pretty lucky it happened.