Intelligent Design from a software engineering perspective.

I have been hearing from the grand old US of A a lot of trouble about Intelligent Design being used as a sneaky tactic (for people who make a habit of not using the little grey cells, this is sneaky) to get creationism into schools. I personally would not discount external interference in our development, I’m not an atheist, I don’t have a defined historical system of belief, but I do object to facts and reasoning (i.e. science) being replaced by a book that was told as a verbal myth by a group who have strange ideas about not eating shell fish (personally I’m a vegetarian, but if I wasn’t shellfish would be high up on my list of favorite sources of protein).

But ID as a theory it can explain the situation, but there was something nagging me, and I couldn’t work out what, then it hit me….

Human, Homo Sapiens, sapiens, the end product of 5 billion years of effort, um, excuse me I think there’s been a error in the future vision department. Are you telling me that someone INTELLIGENT spent 5 billion years on us? I can sing human praises, but generally only of singular individuals, as a species… There are a slight too many design flaws for this to be either the work of an engineer, or the end game of any project development.

I’m in part a software engineer by training, (it was my least favorite/favorite course in my first year and I by and large understood it by the second year of uni), I thought what was probably missing, was a list of requirements for the original design, so that when someone wants to finally work on the Human 2.1 (hopefully already bug tested), these ideas might prove useful, either as a starting point or as something to print out and use as lining for their cat basket smile

Functional Requirements
1. Walks
2. Talks
3. Loves (Optional)
4. Eats
5. Sleeps
6. Processes foodstuffs
7. Produces children (if wanted)
8. Listens to people and trys to understand their viewpoint.
9. Debates Intelligently
10. Does not use blind faith as a fact in an argument
11. Does not kill for power
12. Does not quest for power
13. Does not kill without a very good reason
14. Will feel wracked with guilt if killing has occured
15. Cannot hold gun (Think Vampire+Crosses)
16. 16 fingers and 16 toes (makes binary math easier raspberry)
17. Has stenciled on the inside of eyelids and in birthmarks on the back of hands
“Humans believe that they are more intelligent than dolphins because they have achieved so much, the wheel, new york, wars and the like, while all dolphins have done is kick around in the water and have a good time, dolphins believe that they are more intelligent than humans for exactly the same reason….
18. Mozart piped continually into the womb
19. Only one gender, let people define themselves without having pre-defined models enforced on them
20. NTSCOP – each person born should have their own unique skin colours and patterns, (Never the same skin color or pattern)
21. Universal language with many layers and shades of meaning, full of imagary and ideas.
22. Lives a 1000 years so they don’t think short term
23. Built in wifi connection so they can talk to anyone in the world instantly and comunicate to many people ideas, thoughts, hopes, dreams or even what they had for breakfast.
24. Bootproof head
25. Stomach/Chest kick proof
26. Bad eyesight, everybody needs glasses.

Non-Functional Requirements
a. Lower aggression levels
b. Cannot visulise guns
c. Patience
d. Compassion
e. Hope
f. lack of irrational hatred
g. intollerance of intollerance
h. reverance for terry pratchett
i. reverence for douglass adams
j. love of adventure
k. passion for the unknown
l. incapable of doublethink
n. respect for fellow sentients
o. respect for nature
p. respect for life in general
q. doesn’t trust politicians who wear suits.

I admit that separating out the functional and non-functional requirements may not be strictly accurate according to the definintions, but its late, I’m slightly tired and humans for all their flaws, are hard to put into little boxes like requirements.

Any more ideas for requirements functional or non-functional?