If you’re going to use a “chastity cage” go with an old fashioned one.

These days just about everything you own can connect to the Internet so it can be remotely controlled. For example, I can open and close my garage door from anywhere in the world with the push of a button on an app on my smartphone. Devices that fall into this arena are known as the “Internet of Things” and, yes, even sex toys have joined the fray. Everything from sex dolls to dildos have Internet connected versions. Often to allow a couple to play virtually with each other over great distances.

This might sound great, but you should be sure to consider the implications of what might happen if some hacker manages to take control over your device. Say, for example, if you’re a fan of chastity cages (*link is NSFW) which tend to be popular in BDSM circles. For those not in the know, chastity cages are a subset of chastity belts aimed at men that are little cages for your dick to keep you from getting an erection. As it turns out there are versions of these devices that can connect to the Internet and, like many other IoT devices, security was an afterthought:

It’s all fun and games until your dick gets hacked.

“Your cock is mine now,” the hacker told one of the victims, according to a screenshot of the conversation obtained by a security researcher that goes by the name Smelly and is the founder of vx-underground, a website that collects malware samples.

In October of last year, security researchers found that the manufacturer of an Internet of Things chastity cage—a sex toy that users put around their penis to prevent erections that is used in the BDSM community and can be unlocked remotely—had left an API exposed, giving malicious hackers a chance to take control of the devices. That’s exactly what happened, according to a security researcher who obtained screenshots of conversations between the hacker and several victims, and according to victims interviewed by Motherboard.   

‘Your Cock Is Mine Now:’ Hacker Locks Internet-Connected Chastity Cage, Demands Ransom – Vox

There are just some things that should never be connected to the Internet. A device that locks your dick in a cage is definitely one of those things. Reportedly, the asking price to unlock the device was around 0.02 Bitcoin (around $750 today) which is a helluva price to pay to get your dick back.

I’m not sure what the Cell Mate is made of and I’m at work so I can’t go look it up to find out, but the pic looks like it’s mostly plastic so I suppose you could just break it off your junk. Though how you would do that without also breaking your junk is a mystery. It’s also probably not cheap, though probably much cheaper than the $750 ransom. The Vox article doesn’t say anyone has actually been caught with this thing on their genitals when the ransom note came in so at worst a bunch of people now have a brick for a sex toy.

Consider this your friendly reminder that just because you can put your sex toys on the Internet, that doesn’t mean you should.

2 thoughts on “If you’re going to use a “chastity cage” go with an old fashioned one.

  1. I’d like to think this was just someone’s way of moving the relationship into a deeper level of kink. Start off with just locking it up, then move to financial domination.

  2. Somehow, I can’t summon up enough empathy to feel sorry for anyone who has put his cock at the mercy of the internet. I guess I’m just a bad person.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.