From Facebook friend to blocked in 3 days!

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Well, that was quick. Had someone who asked me to friend them two or three days ago unfriend and block me within the past 12 hours. I only agreed to accept the friend request because we had a mutual friend, but apparently she didn’t look first to see if she’d appreciate my point of view on things spiritual before sending out the invite.

It all started when she posted this Atheism meme on the right here to her wall. It was exactly the sort of thing I find hard to let slide by without comment. So I pointed out that Atheism has nothing to do with the Big Bang Theory or the Theory of Evolution. That atheism says nothing about a person’s beliefs beyond the fact that they lack belief in god(s). Above and beyond that, it misrepresents the science of both theories.

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Things went downhill quickly from there. Someone else asked what it was the meme was trying to say and I pointed out that it was a poor attempt to clapback at a similar meme on Christianity (also to the right). The difference between them being that the Christianity meme hits on actual tenets of Christian faith — everlasting life through belief in a resurrected god, the taint of sin, Eve and forbidden fruit, etc. — that sound ludicrous when you think about it whereas the atheism one doesn’t because atheism isn’t a religion that requires adherence to doctrine.

Then a fourth person made a comment about “a-theism” meaning they must be “a-gainst God” to which I responded with the fact that it’s hard to be against something that doesn’t exist. You may as well say you’re against Unicorns for all the sense that would make. That the word “atheism” has been around since before the 5th century and is derived from the ancient Greek ἄθεος (atheos), meaning “without god(s)”. When I next returned to this thread because someone had liked my comment I was surprised to see it had been deleted.

My new friend then started asking me if I didn’t understand “allegory”, but rather than take up the argument, I pointed out that a previous comment had been deleted. I said I was happy to have this discussion with them if it wasn’t going to upset them, but if my comments were just going to be deleted then I was certain I could find better ways to spend my time.

It was at this point that she took it upon herself to explain to me that her concept of god was less old-white-bearded-guy-in-the-sky than it was “Consciousness” with a capital C. She went on to tell me that there are no atheists in fox holes and that the reason I didn’t believe in whatever it is she considered to be God was because I lacked the curiosity and desire to truly know the truth.

One of the things that always irritates me is when someone who barely knows anything about me attempts to explain to me what I do and don’t know or how much effort I’ve put into understanding or learning about something. So I pointed out to her how arrogant it was to presume that I must not have been sufficiently curious enough or wanted to know the truth bad enough just because I don’t believe the same things she does. I said it was that kind of you-must-not-have-believed-enough “victim blaming” was, frankly, offensive. I pointed out that dismissing my viewpoint being a result of my apathetic curiosity was a lazy way to avoid having to provide support for her beliefs.

Of course, I was much more eloquent in my phrasing, but I’m trying to recall all of this from memory because it appears I’ve been unfriended and blocked as there’s no sign of the comments she had left on posts on my wall and I no longer see her in my friends list.

Not that I am at all bothered by this. Clearly she was happy to be my friend so long as we expressed similar viewpoints. Which, politically at least, we did. However, the moment I disagreed with her on her spiritual beliefs she couldn’t unfriend me fast enough. The thing about it is, I worked very hard not to suggest she was an idiot and even when I got irritated, I tried to keep it civil. I also attempted to drop the matter with a I’ll agree to disagree and move on, but she had to go and try and tell me how I had failed to be curious enough.

Chalk one more win up to my sparkling personality.

8 thoughts on “From Facebook friend to blocked in 3 days!

  1. Suggestion for a new category: “suffering fools gladly”.

    You must be less cranky than i am. Honestly i have very little patience in taking up time to give explanations to people who can’t be bothered to think things through.,,I get Christians and Mormons banging on my domicile door at least once a month trying to recruit me into their loony cults (singing the praises of this psychopathic god of theirs so he won’t beat them up as badly as the non believers) and i refuse to explain my views when they demand it. ..in effect screaming “no Bible crap !” and slamming the door in their faces.
    It probably doesn’t help that they catch me in the bathroom, and when ringing the bell doesn’t work, bang on the door with their fists.

    They seem to have NO clue how condescending it is to push their views on others the way they do.

    Facebook opens you up to all manner of congress with idiots , which is why i eschew it. ..having spent hours in real life explaining things (philosophical or scientific), or sending someone voluminous material via e-mail so they could read for themselves, and then being told they weren’t really listening could i explain it again, or they don’t have time to read.

    WTF ?
    Why should i take up my valuable time, i have zero obligation to explain anything to anyone unless you are carrying a warrant.

    You are better off not wasting your time and spending your time on someone who has at least an open mind.

  2. It really wasn’t my intention to start a fight with this person and I can be quick to abandon hopeless causes when I spot them, but this person had asked to friend me so I had foolishly assumed they had been following me already (all my FB posts are public) and knew what they were getting into, hence the extra patience. In the end it was a self-correcting problem so it all worked out.

  3. Apologies Les, you seem like an uncommonly decent fellow.
    And you are right, it should be chocked up to that person’s obliviousness and not contentiousness. I live in an area where the Christianity is quite aggressively asserted.

  4. I’m sure if you go through the archives you’ll find plenty examples of the same sort around here. As well as me being quite a bit less patient with them. 🙂

  5. I just discovered your blog and like what I see. I had found a post of yours from 2005. Crazy that you’ve been around that long. :p

    Yes, I’ve certainly been in your position a few times. Max Tempkin and Patrick Rothfuss have a great podcast. On it, they brought up a question that now guides most of my online behavior. What is the point of debate and what is your goal? If you’re debating not for education but more out of pride (which, from what you’ve said, I don’t believe you were), that is reprehensible. But also, does what you’re saying help you achieve your goal? What will be the likely outcome? Will your sophistry, dismissiveness, or ad hominem convince them of your logic? Of course not. I thought I was always one of the best in how I comported myself online, but it’s since gotten much better after being exposed to those questions.

    I say this only because I believe that woman would benefit greatly from them as well. It’s like they can’t bring themselves to not at least be condescending or patronizing – they feel their argument will somehow be weaker. I wish I could find a way to effectively communicate to interlocutors that this isn’t so. On the contrary, I’m tempted to take them less seriously.

  6. Go, Les. Thanks for sharing this simple example of why the epic battle against the retards is important.

  7. Wayne, that’s what so frustrating about this. I don’t think this lady was a retard. In fact, we agreed on a number of issues which is why she asked to be friends in the first place. I’m friends with lots of believers, hell, several of my best friends are believers. I have a number of SEB podcasts with one of them right here on the blog.

    She posted that atheism meme and I thought she just thought it was funny, but I’m just pedantic enough that I had to say something about it. When she replied with “I don’t think it’s funny” was my first clue we were in trouble. She was so confident in her stance that the great Consciousness was a real thing that when I told her I was offended that she presumed to know how curious I am about spiritual things it was apparently the straw that broke her back. No big loss, but it shows you that people can be rational about some things and completely irrational about others.

    Which is not something I’m guiltless of myself.

  8. I find it funny when people say that there are no atheists in foxholes. Hubs was in the military and spent a great deal of time overseas in hot, desert areas. He told me that being there is what made him atheist. I don’t know about foxholes, but I do know that seeing a lot of shit and almost dying can make you a non-believer as quick as it can make you a believer.

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