Way back in August of 2003 I wrote an article about a craptastic product known as the Philip Stein Teslar watch. Since then I’ll occasionally get an email from someone who either sells the watches or has owned one and is incensed that I would call them bullshit.
Now, almost eight years to the day that I published the original entry, we have this amazing bit of logic sent in by another fan:
From: Norman Snyder (email@example.com)
Subject: ! CHEAP FUCK THAT’S ALL
You sound like the kinda person that would drop a dollar to pick up a dime, I’f you dont agree with the statements made by Phillip Stein don’t fuckin buy it. keep wearing your mickey mouse watch and be happy. Just because someone can afford to toss money around, shound;nt be of any of your concern, they earned it and can do what ever they wish to do with it! Poor Poor Les NO MONEY FOR ME …. EVERYONE SHOULD LIVE LIKE POOR ASS LES.
You’ll note right away the subtle, but effective use of ALL CAPS as a persuasion technique. The irrefutable logic of “if you can’t afford to wear bullshit you shouldn’t talk about those who can.” His grasp of the finer points of argumentation are undeniably amazing. I am humbled and chastened by his stunning rebuke.
Norman Snyder, making the world safe for douchebags with more money than common sense.