Jesus and his Mom put in joint appearances in Phoenix.

First the Virgin Mary shows up in a water stain on a sidewalk and then Jesus shows up in some stucco. It’s a Christmas Miracle!!! Crowds got so big at the sidewalk location that police had to show up and tell people to stay out of the damned road so residents could get to their houses.

Do we have some crazy to share? Yes we do:

Virgin Mary, Jesus Christ sightings in Valley

“There – you see it?” was commonly heard from the crowd of people.

The image looks like a water mark – but the sidewalk is dry.

“We touched the image; we thought it was water. You can’t get no stain on your hand, so we know its the Virgin Mary,” says one onlooker.

“You can’t get no stain on your hand” should be a tag line for some amazing cleaning product. It makes me wonder if folks could get no stain on their hands at other Virgin Mary sightings? Is being able to get no stain on your hands a sign that it’s not really the Virgin Mary? Seems to make sense considering the fact that you can’t get no stain on your hands is cited as proof that it was her in this case.

People aren’t surprised to see her – the 12th of December is her birthday.

Of course it is. Except that according to the Catholics—who have a bit of a lock on Virgin Mary worship—it’s not her birthday at all. According to the Catholics the Virgin Mary’s birthday is September 8th circa 20 B.C. and today, December 8th, is supposedly the date she was conceived by some hot Dad of Mary (Saint Joachim) on Mom of Mary (Saint Anna) action.

Did you know that Mary’s conception was also considered Immaculate? According to the Catholic Encyclopedia Mary was born without the stain of original sin, but not exempt from the penalties of having said stain. This was apparently necessary for her to be able to give birth to Jesus Christ because you can’t have a sinful person giving birth to the son of God. Apparently the immaculate nature of Mary’s birth was decided by Pope Pius IX on this day back in 1854 as it was apparently a big controversy occupying everyone’s waking moments back then as opposed to, say, not dieing from the plague.

Anyway, back to the crazies:

“She comes out because she wants everyone to know its her birthday and it’s something she wants us to celebrate. It’s just something that she’s happy for.”

It’s certainly a celebration some Phoenix residents want to remember, as they are taking videos and pictures of her surprise appearance.

“When you take a picture of it with a phone you see her hands. You see her head; you see everything.”

Sounds like someone’s robes might be a little too short. Put some panties on for chrissake!

There was another sighting in the Valley – a Scottsdale family snapped a few images of what they say is Jesus with his arms outstretched.

The Rogers family say these images showed up in the stucco of their home about 6 months after moving in.

And they’ve been there ever since.

No word on if they have hundreds of people with nothing better to do with their time milling around at their house. Probably because you can’t “see everything” in the amazing Jesus stucco like you can with the wondrous Virgin Mary water stain.

The news article has a video clip too if you want to see breathless people ooh and ahing over a sidewalk blemish.

3 thoughts on “Jesus and his Mom put in joint appearances in Phoenix.

  1. I looked at the pictures and the Jesus one kind of looks like a figure. Had I just seen it without anybody saying it looks like Jesus I might have stopped and said, “Hmm, Looks like a horse with wings.” The Virgin Mary one though. It looks like a blob with a smaller blob on it. I can’t see that if I try. Although it does kinda of look like Abe Vigota in a bath robe.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.