Nassssty, eeeeeevil, atheistsssssss!

You have got to check out this laugh-riot of an excuse for an essay by Brandon T Stanley at his blog Enemies Foreign and Domestic titled: A Polemic Against Atheism.

A man can never be reasoned out of any position which he never reasoned himself into. Thus is the root of all evil in today’s America: the doctrines of unreason yet made more insidious by masquerading as reason. At the head of these forces is the force of Atheism. This is not meant to soothe the hearts of disbelief, or to call someone to faith. I will not mince word with those who would advance the putrid banner of nihilism under the cover of a cannonade of so-called reason. Atheism as a metaphysic comes to us in a variety of forms: Music, T.V, so called “American Culture”. Atheism, first and foremost, is a religion. All forms of extremist atheism, whether they are Objectivism, Marxism, or any other ism, make metaphysical claims. These claims are never challenged nor questioned. Atheism as a religion has Ten Commandments.

They are:
1) Man consists of nothing more than atoms, hence he has no essence
2) Man should therefore seek Paradise on Earth
3) Reality must be what we see in front of us
4) Religious faith is bad; but faith in fellow man good
5) We must be the judge of whether God is righteous or not
6) Eschatology in religion bad; eschatology in science good
7) Ethical judgments cannot be made; all is relative
8) The Universe is an accident
9) Evolution can never be questioned. Prophet Darwin is unassailable
10) Faith is a stupidity, and faith must be taken as “belief in something you cannot see.”

Are they not patently absurd?

I nearly choked on my lunch from laughing at that drivel. It’s a great example of how to construct a strawman argument and leaves some of the drive-by commenters that come around SEB in the dust. Go read the full thing, but be careful not to be drinking anything when you do.

Brought to us by Brent over at UTI.

52 thoughts on “Nassssty, eeeeeevil, atheistsssssss!

  1. Well, he’s young—perhaps his views can be partially explained by his youth.

    Other than that, he has nothing original to say. Millions of other arrogant theists have made the exact same claims that he’s putting forward here.

  2. His programmers must be laughing, slapping each other on the back and giving up-thumbs, calling: Next! LOL

  3. Hey! 

    I’m an atheist, but i’ve never seen that drivel before.  I certainly don’t belong to any religion.

    Calling atheism a religion is liking saying anyone who doesn’t believe in Santa Claus is in a religion.

    And I don’t “choose” not to believe in God any more than anyone else “chooses” not to believe in the Tooth Fairy or anything else.  You just know it’s dumb, and you forget about it.

    I couldn’t force myself to “believe” in God any more that I could force myself to “believe” in any other thing I know doesn’t exist. 

    I don’t use the Santa and Tooth Fairy examples out of disrespect, but only to explain that one doesn’t “choose” to believe something.

    Is there any argument that could convince you that the Easter Bunny exists?  No. In the same way, there is nothing that could convince me that God exists. 

    I don’t go around preaching atheism to people or trying to convert them.  I figure I’m surrounded by people who believe in God, and while they are otherwise intelligent people, I just won’t mention it, cause it doesn’t matter anyway.  In the same way I wouldn’t step into a classroom of First Graders and announce, “There is no Santa!  Your parents leave the presents!”  I wouldn’t announce that there isn’t a God because it just tends to upset people that won’t change their minds anyway.

    I made up a word: I’m an “Apathist.”  I don’t care if there is a God or not.  It doesn’t matter if there is a God or not because things would be the same either way.  If there IS a God, it has always been that way, and nothing is going to change no matter who wins the argument, and if there ISN’T a God, it has always been that way and things are going to be the same no matter who wins the argument.

    As far as right and wrong is concerned, you should be nice to people, try not to be annoying, and do the best you can.  I don’t need a thick book written by a bunch of dead guys to tell me that.  The Ten Commandments (out of the bible) make sense.  Just about everything Jesus said makes sense.  A lot of what Buddha said makes sense.  People should be good to each other not because some Magic Bearded Dude in the sky is watching over you, but because it is right to be good to one another.

  4. Calling atheism a religion is liking saying anyone who doesn’t believe in Santa Claus is in a religion.

    Or: if “atheism” is a religion, then “off” is a television channel.

  5. double-dipping…

    but i’ve never seen that drivel before

    I wish I could say the same. And SS, old age does not make the True Believer drivel-proof.

  6. “Well, he’s young—perhaps his views can be partially explained by his youth.”

    Ummm! Miss Sadie, may I comment that, being almost 15 (not to mention YOUNGER than the aforementioned dumbfucked twat), I’m smarter than this kid is.

    But, either way :: I did piss my pants while laughing at that. So, whatever, call me immature! Lol.

  7. Doctor M:…I’m smarter than this kid is.

    I’ll say you are. It’s great to see that the younger generation has its cool cats.

    I also laughed heartily at Mr. Stanley’s blog entry—particularly his idea that atheists consider scientific theories such as “The Universe is an accident” to be commandments. What exactly is being commanded there, Brandon?

  8. DocM: So, whatever, call me immature!

    There’s a big difference between being immature and knowing you are than … well I suppose at 20 we all ‘knew it all’ didn’t we? LOL

    Miss Sadie (gee that sounds cute): It’s great to see that the younger generation has its cool cats.

    My thoughts exactly.  smile

  9. What sucks is that most morons that read that will actually think that atheists indeed do have a set of commandments. No matter how stupid it sounds, there is always someone stupider who will buy it.

    Then there’s the apathetic atheist agnostic, as in “I don’t know, I don’t believe, I don’t care

  10. DocM: I’m smarter than this kid is.

    Mate, I just looked at my comment again and there’s an outside chance it could sound a bit patronising.
    You ARE smarter ‘than this kid is.’
    Winston Churchill: To be conservative at 20 is heartless and to be a liberal at 60 is plain idiocy.
    I don’t agree with it (I went the other way) but, if you’ve embraced the left at any time in your life, at least you have a heart.
    I’m trying to use as few words as I can and it’s not working.
    I read a lot of stuff on Brandon_T_Fuckwit’s blog – (atheism was the smallest thing he ‘knew’ about – there was a lot more about war) – I’d love to take him into a war zone but I just could NOT handle that level of fear again.
    As a Vietnam Veteran, that cunt has no fucking idea what war is about when it’s up-close-and-personal. It pisses me off that I gotta use that VV statement. Grrr.
    Oh shit. I’m becoming emotional. Tears.
    Ah … medication time … that’s better.
    Don’t worry. I’m crazy but I know it. Does that mean I’m NOT crazy? LOL

    So, whatever, call me immature! Lol.

  11. I am bearding the lion in his den- his first post
    I am
    I just entered a second post on his answer to my first.  Just think. This person is allowed to vote, drive, and in some places consume alchohol…

  12. Don’t worry. I’m crazy but I know it. Does that mean I’m NOT crazy?

    It’s a hell of a catch, that Catch-22

  13. LH: I am bearding the lion in his den- his first post
    I am
    I just entered a second post on his answer to my first.  Just think. This person is allowed to vote, drive, and in some places consume alchohol…

    Well done but … scary, isn’t he??
    He’s allowed to go to war too – but he won’t.

    Yossarian by any other name is still the Last Hussar: It’s a hell of a catch, that Catch-22

    Great movie – a HELLER va long book.
    Yeah, you ain’t kidding. If you’re crazy you can get out …. but you can’t get out of it if you front up and say you’re crazy, coz that means you ain’t ….
    I found one of my favourite example of the ultimate satire song:

    LOL
    AND to think I was once a fully trained, fully programmed, fucking MAD, mean green killing machine – how I’ve changed – here, chook, chook, chook. LOL
    It all seems so long ago.

  14. A priceless comment by the twit himself, after being called on erecting strawmen:

    As for the idea that this is a strawman argument, I see nothing wrong with using it. Its done all the time to Theists.

    ROTFLMAO!!!

    What college is he going to? He doesn’t seem to get his tuition’s worth.

    As for Godless Ethics, this is an interesting concept and should be explored.

    News at 11! Just as somebody else commented, all ethics is godless. It’s just that only some of us know it.

  15. Even though my faith can at best be described as a “half-hearted agnostic,” I have to admit that from a purely logical point of view atheism makes the most sense!
    Just goes to show that a lot of us humans aren’t all that logical.

  16. From a purely logical point of view, until such time as the theists deliver a coherent definition of a deity that can be falsified, it’s a waste of time pondering what kind of a-something you are.

  17. I have to admit that from a purely logical point of view atheism makes the most sense!

    I agree.  When you see the craziness in this world, war, political goofery, mass stupidity and man’s inhumanity to man, it makes more sense to think that nobody is up there in charge, because if some “higher-power” were up there and in charge, they would be seriously screwing things up.

  18. Yossarian by any other name is still the Last Hussar

    Shhhh- our little secret.  I assumed regs would spot me, and it seemed so much better to quote the quoter. 

    I don’t think the film does the book justice. Not any particular fault of the film, just a complex book, which I found I needed to reread bits as I went along to get the time line straight.

    I’ve posted a second rebuttal on our naive freinds blog.  Little shit a) doesn’t know what he is talking about and b) can’t construct an arguement.

  19. OK, I admit it, I’m just looking for a place to post something as I check this place out so I picked this particular thread kind of at random. 

    I know a few people who post over here and I’ve finally gotten around to taking a look.

    Atheism, a relgion, eh?  I don’t think so.

    Atheism, the most logical stance?  I dunno.  It still makes a lot of sense to me, even though I’m not an atheist (at least not anymore).

    End of test post.  😀

  20. How’s Natley’s whore doing? She still trying to kill you?

    I never saw the film, but I read the book recently. Confusing as hell in parts, but I still enjoyed it greatly.

  21. I’ve just started re-reading Catch-22 for the umpteenth time.

    It’s been a few years since I read it last, but it has one of my favourite little humourous bits on atheism … where one of the characters (I forget her name) becomes upset because another character (I forget his name, too) ‘misrepresents’ the characteristics of the God she doesn’t believe it.

  22. Welcome to the snake den, squirt.  I won’t bite if you don’t jab me with that thorn. :þ

  23. The sentence “Cybermen plus Daleks… together we could upgrade the universe!” is all the proof I need to know that there is a God! (Okay, not really, but still… Daleks and Cybermen!!! WOOT!!).

  24. It’s gonna be a corker. And it’s on BBC1 8 July 2006. My money is NO CHANCE of an alliance- Cybermen Vs Daleks, with the Doctor in between…

    woooooooooooooo hooooooooooooooooooooo.

    Course, you must be an athiest to watch. Life on other planets is against Gods Law. (Notice how I cleverly brought that back on thread? Dying to post this somewhere to let you all on that side of the pond know its GONNA BE A STONKER)

  25. Life on other planets is against Gods Law.

    Not according to everyone’s favorite madcap creationist cartoonist Jim Pinkoski, it’s not.  No kidding.

  26. I recomend reading some of his other articles were he makes the other assertions:

    -Islam suxxors
    -muhammed was insane
    -christianity is responsible for capitalism and consummerism and right wing politics. (Has he actually read the book?)
    -christianity is responsible for democracy
    -liberals are evil blah blah

    It was so easy to poke holes in his writting that I stopped after a few paragraphs out of pity. He is what is known within British circles as ‘a bit of thicky’. He not only completly fails to grasp or even attempt to understand ideas which are opposed. But his understanding of his own religion is so shallow it makes my theologicly obsessed brain hurt to read his articles. Just another 15 year old teenager thinking he understands the world from his own knee-jerk instincts.

  27. I don’t doubt that the rest of the articles are as inane as the one quoted. However, I get the impression that the author is trying to show off his smart mouth and way with words rather than his logical prowess. If so, it seems to me that tying a pink ribbon around a steaming pile of shit isn’t enough to distract from the turd.

  28. Just read Brandon’s genius bio and anyone who lists his favorite music as heavy metal and classical all in the same sentence has told me all I need to know!!!!!!!!!!
    Plus I bet he had to look up those books to find ones that looked good!

  29. Well, he posted my first comment, but he dembskied the second.  Either that, or the atheists of the world are swarming him and he doesn’t have the bandwidth to handle it. LOL

  30. I don’t doubt that the rest of the articles are as inane as the one quoted.

    The Democrats are intending to impose a marxist leninist state (‘Democrats plan for 06’)

    Time for your meds Mr Stanley…

  31. Well, he posted my first comment, but he dembskied the second.  Either that, or the atheists of the world are swarming him and he doesn’t have the bandwidth to handle it. LOL

    He never posted mine; big baby!  LOL I don’t even remember what I said now, though it must’ve threatened him somehow.  I think choosing to approve comments on one’s own blog (for any reason other than SPAM anyway) is pretty pussified though.

  32. I love the term ‘dembskied’ to mean deleting comments that one can’t answer and wishes not to face.  cool grin

    I don’t have comment moderation turned on, though I do delete certain classes of comments even when they’re not spam.  Commenters who make a point, even if i strongly disagree, can stay.  Commenters who just say things like “Huh – you fags should all just get a life”, I delete.

    The commenter I have the most trouble with is my middle son.  He drops by occasionally to vivisect one of my posts and leave it twitching on the floor all bloody and gory.  And damn it, he’s usually right.  If I were going to ‘dembski’ anyone… but of course I don’t.

    s’OK – hell, I’m just glad to hear from him!  Though it can be disconcerting having children smarter than oneself.  hmmm

  33. I meant to add about Brandon – he lists Sagan’s Pale Blue Dot as among his favorite books.  He is aware that Sagan’s an atheist, is he not?  wink 

    But hey, he’s a smart kid, and confuses being smart with knowing a damn thing about, well, anything.

    He wants to become “a published author”.  Well, he did that; he has a blog, with quite a few readers, too.  Maybe he covets the ego-trip of seeing his name on a hard-bound book.  Or maybe he has misconceptions about how much money one makes from publishing a book.  Unless your name is Mitchner, Rowling, Waller, Crichton, etc., good luck!.

  34. Just had a great idea. Why don’t we introduce Brandon Stanley to David Thompson and then record the conversation. wow!

  35. you know, the kid is only twenty.  I was a dumb shit at twenty.  I’m still a dumb shit at 39.  Let’s let him actually live out of the nest a few years and check back in with him.  This whipping a puppy for peeing on the floor before it knows better.

  36. Moses: I bet he had to look up those books to find ones that looked good!

    I was surprised he didn’t have any of Annie Coulter’s books listed as he sounds such a clonified version of her in so many ways.

    DoF: Though it can be disconcerting having children smarter than oneself.

    And, you love it. LOL

    DM: I was a dumb shit at twenty.

    In retrospect, we all were. But, at the time, didn’t we all think we were masters of the universe? LOL

  37. But, at the time, didn’t we all think we were masters of the universe?

    Yes and no.  When I was twenty-something, a friend suggested an exercise on power, which I performed and found useful.  I hiked up the Big River, found a lonely hilltop, and stood there, facing each of the compass points in turn, shouting out “I am the Ruler of the Universe, and the Master of Space and Time”.  Just as my friend said, I was filled with a sense of my punyness, and collapsed on the ground laughing.  But I was seen- I caught a glimpse of a fellow wanderer disappearing into the bushes.  I recognized him later in the streets of Mendocino, but he looked at me askance and hurried away.  I wonder why…

  38. LJ: “And, you love it.”

    You bet!  I can be disconcerted and happy at the same time.  I contain multitudes.

    Zilch – funny story.  A parable on the value of absurdity LOL

  39. Like Zilch I don’t think I ever held the illusion that I was all that and a bag of chips in my early 20s. If anything most of my early years were filled with doubts of my own abilities and worth. I didn’t become all that confident in myself as a person until I hit my 30s.

  40. I’m trying to remember my early 20s … I think they were good.  It was in my late teens / early 20s that I started reading Voltaire and Camus and Sartre and all that fun stuff.  And damn, they gave me university credit for writing drivel about it.  Minoring in French Lit was one of the best decisions I made as a young’un ….

  41. As every parent should know, never confuse the lack of experience with the lack of intelligence.

    With regards to Brandon, I haven’t formed an opinion about how smart he really is, but he sure lacks experience. But not to worry, some people get themselves appointed to President even though they appear to lack both.

    I don’t recall having had a case of masteroftheuniversitis at age 20. Come to think of it, I was done with military service as a conscript at that time, which sort of puts things into perspective. I hear Brandon also writes military prose – perhaps he should serve in the military first to get some hands-on experience…

  42. I’m in my early twenties now and I’ve really started to wise up to the world and other people. Having experianced humanity and read varociously since I was 18 I’m far more mature and far less pretencious than Brandon is. Hell I havnt spouted crap like him since I was 16. In all honesty from his writting style and extreme opnions I’d say he’s led a rather sheltered and conceited life, he certainly hasnt given actually thought through his opnions very well-his tendacy to be contradictive, willfully ignorant and often hypocritical tends to shine through in his work.

    If he read a little or at the very least assumed a more consistant veiwpoint (you can’t praise Ghengis Kahn for his success and then lambast Islam for doing far less). His writting would improve substancially

  43. The hell with all these smart assed twenty somethings. I have a kid who is seventeen and he’s way smarter than all of them put together. Just ask him!

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