Yes, I’m definitely a Blue Neck.

We’ve all heard the never-ending cascade of Jeff Foxworthy You-Might-Be-A-Red-Neck jokes, but have you ever considered the possibility that you Might Be A Blue Neck?

YOU JUST MIGHT BE A BLUE NECK
IF…

…Instead of referring to two or more people as “Y’all,” you call them “you guys,” even if both of them are women.

…You think barbecue is a verb meaning “to cook outside.”

…You think Heinz Ketchup is really SPICY.

…You would never stop to buy something somebody was cooking on the side of the road. (e.g., boiled peanuts, not road kill, Dummy!)

…You don’t have any problems pronouncing “Worcestershire sauce” correctly.

…For breakfast, you would prefer potatoes-au-gratin to grits.

…You don’t know what a moon pie is. You have probably never watched a moon pie in a microwave.

There’s more at the link and I’m proud to say that based on that list I’m most definitely a Blue Neck, though I do recognize some things such as what a Moon Pie is because I come from a long line of Red Necks.

16 thoughts on “Yes, I’m definitely a Blue Neck.

  1. many folks you will find around here can quote many
    religous texts with surprizing ease, many come from
    quite orthodox backgrounds and still value them.

    some of us are run of the
    mill hoodlums. i keep tellin myself it takes all kinds and
    to be calm and rational. no biting.

    well, except the stupid ones. mmm chicken

  2. You shall know the Truth and the Truth shall set you free. 

    Oh shit my doctrine’s hanging out.

  3. I must be a “Purple-neck”.

    I’ve seen a moon pie but never put one in a microwave. I’ve put Twinkies in a camp fire. Does that count?

    I drink RC occasionally.

    I love okra in all it’s forms.

    I eat chicken with my fingers even when I’m out.

    I know that a polecat is a skunk.

    I call what I drink cokes even though it’s a Pepsi.

    I own 4 cans of WD40, one upstairs, one downstairs, one in the car and one at work.

    I have friends with 2 first names and women friends named Billie and Sammie.

    My dad is PawPaw to his grandkids.

    So, I’ve got a pretty even mix which makes me purple necked I guess.

  4. *I know what Moon Pie is, though I’ve never tried it.

    *I’ve known an Amy Jo and a J.J. (does that last one count?).

    *I call my grandfather “Papa” (but not PawPaw).

    *I don’t call binoculars “opera glasses.” I call them “binoculars.”

    *I don’t think Heinz is spicy.

    *A lot of things come to mind when I hear the word “barbeque.” It can be a term describing a mesquite flavor (like barbeque chips—my favorite!), a hibachi-style grill, or an outdoor cookout, among other things.

    Keep in mind I was raised in Kansas. Other than these points, I’m pretty solidly a blue-neck.

  5. While I do generally say ‘Y’all’, I’m far more in favor of scientific funding than football.  I certainly know what a polecat is, and am always glad to ‘hep’ someone if they need it.  And while I think there is something disturbingly wrong with putting a cute sweater on a dog, I drink… DIET PEPSI!!!

    Truly I am a man without a country.  Or at least a region.

  6. You may be a blue neck if..

      You’ve never been kicked out of the zoo for heckling monkeys.  wink

  7. One item is very wrong:

    …You think Heinz Ketchup is really SPICY.

    That would be the fact in most of the south, especially Texas. The myth of the ‘fire-eatin Texan’ is simply that—a myth.

    Most of the spice/hot sauce store here close up shortly after they burn through (ar ar) their seed money, because there simply is no market.

    I can get hotter food in NYC than I can in all of Houston, Austin or San Antonio.

    Some of the hottest food I’ve ever had (not in Texas) was at an Irish Pub that had an attached restaurant in Santa Monica, CA. Somehow an Irish guy and a West Indies guy decided to go in together. The curry I had there was hot enough to scorch the paint off the Space Shuttle heat shield (damn good Chutney, tho).

  8. Except for a couple of them I’m definitely a blue neck (never knew polecat=skunk).  Bryan I’ve never heard that about teh South so it surprises me.  I’ve always been under the impression its not hard to find people that will chug tobasco sauce and that the Southern Mexican restaurants make Northern Mexican restaurants look like panzies.  I wonder though how many Southerners have had or know what wasabi is.  And a video just for fun.
    http://media.ebaumsworld.com/wmv/wasabi.wmv

  9. Damn, that video is extreme! Anyone who encourages someone to snort wasabi deserves to be pounded several times with a nuclear reactor.

    It’s funny that I love wasabi for the burn but it’s the only spicy type condiment I can stomach. Yet, encouraging someone to snort it would be the same, to me, as encouraging someone to drive a nail through his or her naval.

    Remember the faces of the individuals in that video so you can recognize one, or all, in the inevitable police line-ups to come.

  10. I apologize for forcing the image of driving a nail through our Naval, much less our Armal or Air Forceal.

    I deserve, but hope I don’t get, an outie navel for picking a word that spell check couldn’t save me from mis-spelling.

    Than again a nail through the navel would probably cure anyone of an outie.

  11. Theocrat, have you ever seen Jackass: The Movie? In that film the audience is exposed to a delightful scene in which one of the brain-damaged protagonists (I’m using that term generously) snorts a dollop of wasabi and then momentarily suffers from a vomiting reaction. Unfortunately for the audience, the film depicts all of it in vivid detail. Good thing I didn’t spend any money on that movie. I can watch idiots puke for free if I so desired.

  12. Well, I guess I am as far from a blueneck as possible. I am from Texas, born and raised, and although I’ve traveled from time to time, my heart always thought of Texas as my home.
    I know what:
    “big hat no cattle”
    “the engines runnin but ain’t nobody driving”
    “We’ve howdied but we ain’t shook yet”
    “This ain’t my first rodeo”
    “They ate supper before they said grace “
    and “You can put your boots in the oven, but that doesn’t make them biscuits”
    all mean…
    I know that If asking directions east of downtown, you must have a working knowledge of Spanish.
    and I am very familiar with the fact that you never stare at the driver of the car with the bumper sticker that says, “Keep honking. I’m reloading.”
    We are very paticular down here… and thats the way I like it.

  13. I’m glad I’m British.

    If Worcestershire is too difficult then ‘Worcester’ is an acceptable – if slightly ‘common’ alternative. Listening to a Columbine- any Yank, red blue or purple- say Worstershire is a verbal trainwreck.

    Woo-stir-sheer

    I think it’s trying to say ‘shire’ that does it

    I wiki’ed Moon Pie. sounds like a sweet we had as a kid (that is ‘candy’ not ‘dessert’) called Wagon Wheels- about the size of a biscuit.

    What you want is some traditional working class London food, especially bread pudding (not bread and butter pudding), or pork scratchings.  My dad still likes a bit of dripping on toast, though this has had to stop (unless he can’t be arsed) since he had his stent put in.  Never fancied eels, but fried liver and bacon with boiled tatties, peas and thickening- mmmm.

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