Do you know what today is? It’s National Hairball Awareness Day. How fucking stupid is that?
Seriously folks, if you own a cat then chances are your awareness of hairballs is pretty damned high already and if you don’t own a cat then I can assure you that hairball ignorance is bliss. There’s a lot of issues that your average American could use a good heaping helping of “awareness” about, but hairballs isn’t one of them. It shouldn’t come as any surprise that one of the promoters of “National Hairball Awareness Day” happens to be Hill’s Pet Nutrition Inc. makers of the Science Diet® Hairball Control cat food that has “natural fiber technology.”
This “Awarness Month/Week/Day” nonsense has gotten so out of hand that next month—May for those of you who are a little slow—there are 50 things it’s the “Month Of,” 38 things “Of the Week,” and around 110 things that are “Days” which includes long standing traditions such as Mother’s Day, but also much less widely observed occasions such as “Get Caught Reading Month,” “More Than Just A Pretty Face Month,” “National Hug Holiday Week” (7-13), “Kiwanis Prayer Week” (14-20), “Paranormal Day” (3rd), “Respect for Chickens Day” (4th), “Do Dah Day” (6th), and the “National Infertility Survival Day” (7th). I can see it now:
Me: “Hello. My name is Les and I’m a survivor of infertility and a recovering chicken disrespecter.”
Crowd: “HELLO LES!”