Stupid job training ads disguised as job opportunities.

I really hate it when you apply for a job online only to find out that the job listing was really a job training ad in disguise. I just got an email back from some group calling itself “National Employment”—gotta love that generic name—which says that based on my resume I’m perfect for their Technical Apprenticeship program. I didn’t think I was applying for a technical apprenticeship program at the time, but I go check out their website just the same. Turns out they offer courses in various areas such as A+/Network +/MCDST or MCSE or CISCO CCNA/CCNP after which they put you into a paid internship with a local company and offer lifetime placement services from that point on. That’s great except the courses cost between $11,000 and $15,000 to take in the first place. Even if I were inclined to take out a loan to pay for these courses I’d still have the problem of how do I keep my family afloat long enough to make it through the courses in the first place. My goal is to go back to school once I’m employed again assuming, of course, that I’m earning enough to survive and go back to school, but it’s very annoying to answer what you think is a job offer only to get hit with a sales pitch. That’s dishonest and it makes me leery of ever considering the courses in question if I do get back to a point where I could afford to do so.

Down to my last two weeks of unemployment and a couple of hopeful positions that had come along haven’t panned out after all. Needless to say, I’m getting a little desperate here. I have no idea how I’m going to solve this problem and I’m out of ideas. I’ve been in sink or swim situations before and this is the first time I’ve actually worried about sinking. Oh well, back to scanning for more people to shoot resumes off to…

13 thoughts on “Stupid job training ads disguised as job opportunities.

  1. Ack. Yeah, those kinds of “job opportunities” are annoying.

    If you are good with web design or coding, you might check out craigslist as it often has a decent variety of jobs including work from home or short term contract jobs…if you have not already looked there.

    Not really sure of other good places besides the yellow pages and cold calls to likely places that might need your skills asking if they are hiring. Almost everything I have found online is bogged down in “recuiters” who refuse to try and get people without a college degree a job.

    Anywise, best of luck. I know how hard it can be for us older, skilled, non-college degree holding people to get jobs anymore…

  2. If you’ve got some basic knowledge of hard drives and can write, I know of some opportunities. Problem is, it requires locating to the west coast. I don’t know, but I think the company might help. Email me if you’re interested.

  3. funny i drop by here today. i called three places this morning (from today’s paper) only to find out that the positions have been filled. grrrr.

  4. You can always drive a truck.  Thats what I do.  I also stay hooked to the net through either wi-fi access or through a cellular connection (slooooooooow).  But anyways, its what I had to do when I couldn’t find a job that paid enough to support my family.  Just a suggestion, I guess.  Also, I go to school online while I work full time so that way I don’t have to be in this truck forever.  I am writing this right now from the sleeper of my truck in Santa Nella, CA.  Just a suggestion if you really need to work bad enough.  And you will never run out of stuff to post on here driving around other people all day.

  5. You can always drive a truck.

    Pahhahahahah!

    Oh SURE!  You’ve got it good NOW Shadoza, but come the ‘peak oil’ crisis, I and my union of rickshaw pullers will take over the shipping industry in it’s entirety!

    (cue evil laugh and even more evil twiddling of long thin mustachios)

  6. I’m still trying to get past the image of Les in a 16-wheeler with his head out the window yelling; “What the fuck is wrong with you drivers?”

    Priceless!

  7. Hey, its not what I want to do either but I gotta pay the bills.  Just trying to help, I just came across this site today for the first time.  I like your perspective on things.  Your post about the job though, just giving you some light from a different angle. 

    One time I found a job posting online, I figured it was a scam but it was only 6 bucks, what the heck I’d give it a shot. The ad said “make money from home marketing and stuffing envelopes.  Send $6.00 for shipping and you will get all the info you need to work from home” ……  I sent 6 bucks in the form of a money order….

    A week later I got an envelope with a floppy disk, it said the floppy had all the info I needed to get started.  The floppy said “All you gotta do is set up a pay pal account or some other way of recieving money. And post this on the internet or local paper…  “make money from home marketing and stuffing envelopes.  Send $6.00 for shipping and you will get all the info you need to work from home”

    I think the laugh was worth the 6 bucks…

  8. Oddly enough I find the idea of being a long-haul driver quite intriguing.  One of my next door neighbors was a driver and always had a good tale to tell.  Nowadays those trucks have more technology in them than my home office.  I considered the career change many of time, mostly during dumb-ass meetings.

    I know most large areas that have non-profs that seek skilled individuals to help with their technology infrastructure or teach.  The pay is kind of lousy but it might tide you over and at least your resume won’t have big gaps in it.

    Best of luck and I hope you find something to tide you over soon.

  9. Citizen L, thanks for the offer, but I don’t know if my skill set is of the sort that would warrant folks paying to move me across the country. With the cost of living on the West Coast being considerably higher than here it would have to be a really good paying job to make the transition.

    Shadoza, don’t you have to go through quite a bit of training to become a big rig driver? My brother-in-law went through that and, again, it’s a matter of not having the money for the classes in the first place. I’m not necessarily opposed to the idea—hell I already look like the trucker stereotype—but I don’t think it’s something I can just up and start doing.

    DeadScot, non-profs? You’re going to have to elucidate a bit. Not sure what you’re talking about.

  10. Shoot me an email if you like and I can give you information about it.  I think he is using the term “non-prof” as a non profit organization.

  11. Shandoza has a good idea there.  All I hear from your Uncle is they need drivers bad!  There are firmz that teach you and then put you into a truck.  You are intelligent enough to drive salely.  You pick up what you need to know quickly and as Shadoza said you can get that degree on line as you make a living.

  12. DeadScot, non-profs? You’re going to have to elucidate a bit. Not sure what you’re talking about.

    Non-profit organizations such as the Red Cross, Churches, crisis centers, etc… are generally limited in the amount of overhead they can carry.  The often put off non-critical projects and the like until there’s an influx of money.

    The positions are almost always temporary and somewhat under-funded.  I worked on a project with a school once and they brought in one person to normalize the student data.  He worked on it diligently until funding ran out.  I’m sure as the school took in more money they either brought him or someone else in to finish off the project.

    Planned Parent-hood and Churches work in the same manner.  They may need a network upgrade, small site conversion or even classes.  Due to the funding and the nature of the non-prof, these positions are rarely advertised and they organization plays Russian Roulette with a temp agency.

    Working in a church is no big deal since only permanent staff are around when you’re working on something.  Plus, it’s not like you’d be there for eternity.  I would check with private schools and city shelters first since school just started and the unemployment numbers aren’t promising.  Children and churches always get money first.

  13. Just thought of something else.  The local big box stores like Best Buy, Circuit City and Office Depot may have lost some of their geek help as students returned to classes.

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