I can’t help it. It’s a sickness.

As anyone who’s been around this site for any length of time already knows, I’m a big fan of the Yuletide season. So much so that the first chilly breaths of winter’s coming chill in September is enough to cause me to break out the carols and it’s everything I can do to keep from slapping my Christmas tree up on November 1st. Yeah, I’m not one to complain about how long the “season” has become in recent years.

As an example of how badly I’m bitten by this particular bug I was just flipping through the channels and came across the Home Shopping Network. This is a channel I never, ever, ever stop to watch because it holds absolutely no interest for me. Until today. Apparently over the past couple of days they’ve been having their Christmas in July sale and offering up all manner of holiday themed merchandise for you to spend money on. At the exact moment I happened to land on the channel they were advertising a lawn ornament that hooked me instantly: The Santa Land Here! Rooftop or Front Yard Landing Light Set. Essentially it’s a set of miniature runway landing lights shaped like Christmas trees that flash in sequence like the landing lights leading to a real runway along with a light up sign that says “Santa Land Here!” They have a video of it in action on their site. It’s cheesy as hell and they want $86.95 for the damned things which is a deal compared to the listed retail price of $164.94 they claim it normally costs.

Now even if I weren’t unemployed I’d still have to win the lottery before I would ever consider spending close to a hundred bucks on a light set like this, but damn if that doesn’t diminish the desire I felt when I saw them. Not only do I not have the money, but I don’t have the yard to put them in being that I’m still living in an apartment, but I fear for my future neighbors when I finally do become rich and buy a big house with lots of area to decorate with lights and figures. The sadder part is that I’ve been sitting here for the past half hour watching the Home FREAKIN’ Shopping Network and dreaming about which decorations I’d buy for a holiday that’s still 6 months away. The Yuletide goodies are somehow overcoming the annoyingly cloying forced bubbliness of the hosts that would normally have made me change the channel by now.

Ooooo! Candy Cane with Bow light up sidewalk arch! Also incredibly overpriced, but soooo festive! Somebody shoot me now!

3 thoughts on “I can’t help it. It’s a sickness.

  1. Everyone’s gotta have some whacko traits in himself, Les. We know thats one of yours wink

    The Yuletide goodies are somehow overcoming the annoyingly cloying forced bubbliness of the hosts

    Strange, I would have probably described the GOODIES with those words. But then, when it comes to aesthetics, I’m somewhat of a stodgy puritan wink

  2. oh fucking christ.. I saw some of that shit on the
    tube and I must say. some of the most absoloutely tacky shit Ive ever seen. gawdy as all hell..

    other than the five tons
    of vintage bullshit that gets strapped to my neighbor’s house and sucks the power out of a single outlet

    I put up a wreath. thats it. and im in no hurry.

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