SEB’s Heresy Of The Day!

Today’s heresy comes from JethricOne who writes:

    Everybody knows that Jesus was perfect, right?
    Does that mean he didn’t have to “measure twice, cut once”?

    Can you picture the union co-workers?
    “Slow down, Jesus! You’re making the rest of us look bad.”

    How about the crucification being sponsored by competitors who lost YET another bid to “Joseph and Sons” carpentry?

    This train of logic starts going downhill very fast. smile

Oh, the directions this could go in…

12 thoughts on “SEB’s Heresy Of The Day!

  1. Is it just me or does anyone else think that Jesus might have been gay? Think about it:

    • He never married or had a girlfriend
    • He hung around with 12 Guys all the time

    I’m sure there are a bunch or TrueBelievers screaming “Now THAT’S Heresy!”.

  2. How about Mark 14:45 (Judas kissed Jesus) and Mark 14:51, 52, and remember the night was cold (Mark 14:54, 67). And, like Michael Smith in “Stranger in a Strange Land”, would he not have to be perfect to both male and female? I’d better stop, here. The weatherman predicted thunder storms and lightning in my vicinity.  wink

  3. TheBo$$ blasphemed:

    Is it just me or does anyone else think that Jesus might have been gay?

    Sure Jesus was gay (not that there’s anything wrong with that)! I bet he made a fabulous quiche.

    Yes this entry does have divers possibilities but you guys get mad when I make fun of Jesus.

    Still I bet he really pissed off his surfer buddies.

    “Dude, you gotta hang ONE at least or you aren’t really mastering those waves.”

  4. I’m nuteral on the whole subject.I mean its hard to belive a dude was born to a virgin.I mean come on,whats with that.But still,its no reason to dissing other people’s shit.Let them belive what they want and do what they want.I fucking budist so I respects everyones shit.Unless the suits get their own religion.In which case I’d go to the suit churchs and kill the fuck out of all of them.Plus i’d burn it down.              PEACE,
                      DOWN WITH BIG
                        BROTHER

  5. Reminds me of a song by Corporate Avenger:

    God is good, God is great,
    I think that he might be gay.

    Not saying God is gay,
    Not saying that at all.
    But if Jesus Christ was God and God created all.
    Then Jesus Christ created the homosexual.
    There might be a little fag in us all.

  6. word, i mean, theres a chance jesus was the first gay pregnancy as well. who was this joseph(josephina) his mom hung out with all the time? plus think nunneries. what do all those old women do all day but fondle eachother all day in the name of the almighty love-machine.

    hey, i have some fun aim conversations that i’ve titled the One Hit Kill to christianity. it doesnt fit in this thread but ill email em to ya. my favorite thing to use to piss off christians is their own bible.

    Jesus Freeze US!! With Your Laser Beam of love!!
    Daniel

  7. Sure Jesus was gay (not that there’s anything wrong with that)! I bet he made a fabulous quiche.

    Now that’s blasphemous, and you will pay the consequences, Brock!  Everyone knows that a fabulous quiche must have salmon in it, and there’s no salmon for hundreds of miles around Palestine.

    Jesus
    sneezes
    when He
    pleases

  8. I’d like to think Jesus would appreciate a good Jesus joke.

    In the film Black Narcissus, a group of nuns try to establish a convent in the Himalayas.  In part of the area they’ve taken over, there sits a Holy Man who just stares into space day and night.  The Mother Superior wonders aloud to an American living in the area what’s to be done with this nuisance.  The American has had enough of her hoyty-toyty attitude, and replies, “What would Jesus do about it?”

    I’d like to think Jesus would’ve probably sat right down next to the guy and given it a try himself.

    (lest anyone think otherwise, I am indeed an atheist)

    —Joe grin

  9. Reporter from the Daily Aremethia: “Mary, I understand you just gave birth last night?”

    Mary: “Why yes I did.  Why do you ask?”

    Reporter from the Daily Aremethia: “You named him Jesus?”

    Mary: “Yes”

    Reporter from the Daily Aremethia: “And you say you are a virgin?”

    Mary: “Ummmm…..Yeah”

    Reporter from the Daily Aremethia: Frantically alerting the rest of his crew, “Oh shit, we’ve got the messiah!”

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