You’ve gotta admit the folks who run Trinity Southern University in Texas must be amazing educators. They’re so amazingly surprisingly good that they managed to take an ordinary house cat and teach it enough about business administration that it was able to graduate from the school with a degree and a 3.5 grade average. Not only that, but in this day and age of rising tuition costs they managed to pull off this incredible feat for a mere pittance. For some reason, though, the state of Pennsylvania thinks something is amiss and is suing to shut the school down.
Investigators paid $299 for a bachelor’s degree for Colby Nolan — a deputy attorney general’s 6-year-old black cat — claiming he had experience including baby-sitting and retail management.
The school, which offers no classes, allegedly determined Colby Nolan’s resume entitled him to a master of business administration degree; a transcript listed the cat’s course work and 3.5 grade-point average.
The state is seeking a permanent injunction, civil penalties, costs and restitution for violating consumer law and restrictions on unsolicited e-mail ads.
Personally, I think this is a bigoted and transparent attempt to keep cats subservient to humans by denying them the ability to gain the necessary degrees needed in the demanding world of business administration. Many cats already have the requisite talent and dedicated self-absorption to be professional syndicated cartoonists so why not MBAs? It’s naked speciesism at its worst.