“Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban” in Fifteen Minutes

In what appears to be a growing trend, we here at SEB were highly amused to come across yet another movie parody that attempts to reduce a modern blockbuster, or blockbuster wannabe in the case of Van Helsing, to a mere fifteen minutes. This time it’s “Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban” in Fifteen Minutes. Here’s a couple o’ free samples:

Great Hall, Hogwarts

GROOVY NEW DUMBLEDORE: Many thanks to the Richard Harris Memorial Toad Choir for that lovely performance. Greetings, salutations, and what up: I will be your new Dumbledore this year, which I’m sure will be fabulous despite the presence of a few hundred undernourished ringwraiths on the premises. Hagrid will be taking over the Care of Magical Creatures class despite having no teaching credentials whatsoever, and also, we have a new teacher, Professor Lupin, to fill our cursed Defense of the Dark Arts spot. Good luck making it through the year alive, Remus!

SNAPE: *gives Lupin the stink-eye*

LUPIN: Oh, I feel at home already.

… and …

Some Really Long Bridge on the School Grounds That Didn’t Exist Before This Movie

Everyone else has gone to Hogsmeade. Harry can’t, because the Dursleys suck.

LUPIN: So I knew you’d conjure something terrifying, which is why I stopped you.

HARRY: Except that… you totally didn’t.

LUPIN: Whatever. My point is, I thought you’d choose Voldemort for your turn.

HARRY: Well, then, that makes letting me have a whack at the boggart really stupid, now, doesn’t it?

LUPIN: …

HARRY: …

LUPIN: Here, eat this chocolate. You know, you look a lot like your father. Except that you have J.K. Rowling’s eyes.

HARRY: Awww, thanks.

I laughed! I cried! I snorted pop up my nose! Now go read the rest.

Found via ***Dave who seems to be collecting these things lately.

UPDATE: OK, I just have to include one more bit that made me literally laught out loud and startle several office mates who thought I was actually engaged in serious work:

HERMIONE: If you want to kill Harry, you’ll have to kill us first!

HP FANS: OMGWTF THAT WAS RON’S LINE! YOU CHANGED THINGS FROM THE BOOK!

LOTR FANS: What are you, new?

Ow, my sides hurt now.

5 thoughts on ““Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban” in Fifteen Minutes

  1. HAHA!!  I loved the movie…but it was a sort of love-hate thing…some stuff was great…some stuff was inexplicable…and I am going to have to see it again.  Soon.  David Thewlis…I cannot imagine anyone else besides him as Lupin now.  Kind of scary.

  2. Absolutely hilarious!  I’m a big fan of the books, though I think making movies out of any of them after the second one is just too ambitious to succeed – too much stuff has to be left out, and it loses something.  And I was inexplicably irked by the total change in art direction from the last two movies to this one.  And yes, the kids are unfortunately aging faster than the scriptwriters can keep up with them.

    This parody was just brilliant, though!  Also, check out the one she does on [url=http://www.livejournal.com/community/m15m/1487.html]Troy.  Another movie that suffered from too much modification of the original story.  (Agamemnon dies?!?  So then what about the Oresteia?  And Hector kills Menelaus?!?!?  And Helen stays with the Trojans??!  And…oh, just too much.)

  3. Bleh.  That’s what I get for deciding just this once not to Preview my post.

    Here’s the proper link.

    Sorry, guys.

    My submission word: eyes.  Hmm.  Should’ve kept mine open and caught my mistake on the last post!

  4. Saw the movie yesterday.  Yeah, definate art change, but aside from the change itself, I thought the art looked pretty good. 

    Don’t know about anyone else, but at times, I felt like I was watching a “Cliff Notes” version of the book.  I wonder what someone who had not read the books would think of the movie. 

    I thought they did a decent job in editing the Hagrid’s class subplot, and condensing the Hogsmeade visits. 

    Considering the book lengths, I really am worried about how the 4th movie is going to turn out.  I would honestly be happier with it being two movies.  They do well enough that they should be able to do it.  Then again, I am one of those who would enjoy a 5 hour LOTR or Harry Potter movie if it covered more of the book.  They’d have to do a mini-series to really cover material, but that wouldn’t be as profitable as a movie.

  5. Not too bad, I watched it with my kids.  Kinda wonder where it’s going from here.

    maybe about the girl getting her period.

    They are getting alittle old and should speed up the sequals or film them when they are young.

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