See? We even have dumbasses here in Canton, Michigan. Fellow Canton resident Kirk Jones dove into the water at Niagara Falls on Monday and plunged head first over the edge without so much as a life preserver to emerge alive and relatively unharmed 170 feet down. I must admit that on the one hand it’s a pretty cool feat, but on the other it’s still a pretty dumbass thing to do.
Kirk Jones’ leap into Niagara Falls fame began around 12:45 p.m. Monday on the Canadian side, known as Horseshoe Falls.
Terry McMullen of Columbus, Ohio, was sightseeing Monday with his wife, Brenda, when he heard her scream.
“I turned and I was looking at him right in the face when he passed, and another 20 feet and down he went,” said McMullen, who snapped photos. “He was on his back, his face up and he had his arms stretched level with his head, feet first,” calmly and quietly floating toward the precipice.
Brenda McMullen became distraught, figuring she had seen the remaining seconds of a man’s life.
But minutes later, as people yelled out to call 911, the McMullens saw Jones climb out of the water onto a rock.
Jones’ stunt will likely earn him a place in the Guinness Book of World Records as well as a likely $10,000 fine from severely pissed off officials. In this day and age of Jackass inspired idiots I’m willing to bet it’ll also generate a lot of imitators and a bit more thinning of the gene pool as a result.
Now that I think about it, that may not entirely be a bad thing…