What happens when you try to combine a keyboard with the controller from a game console and a trackball? You get the monstrosity pictured here called the AlphaGrip AG-5 3D Keyboard and Trackball. That’s just the front, the back is covered with even more buttons to make sure that you end up using all 10 fingers at once. According to the ad-copy you want one of these painful looking devices for the following reasons:

Write emails, instant messages, and take notes comfortably from any position at 50 words per minute and enjoy 10-finger touch control for enhanced, desk-free gaming with an AlphaGrip, model AG-5, a handheld keyboard and mouse that has the look and feel of a game controller on steroids. With a scientifically designed button layout, Enhanced Qwerty, the AlphaGrip gives you fast, comfortable access to all the keys you need for high speed typing and gaming. Its handheld design enables powerful desk-free computing from any location in any position: leaning away from your desk, standing up, riding in a vehicle, relaxing on a sofa in your living room, sitting on the floor, leaning back in a recliner, or even lying in bed. The AlphaGrip is also the best all around input device for laptop and notebook computers, whether in the office, on the road, or at home.

My wife won’t touch the PS2 controller because it already has more buttons than she knows what to do with, I think this controller would send her into shock. Still I’m sure there’s someone out there somewhere who not only wants a controller like this but is capable of mastering it with super-human skill putting us mere mortals in our place. Kind of like the weirdos who could solve a Rubik’s Cube in 30 seconds flat. Check the extended section for illustrated pictures of all the buttons…

Found via Joystiq.