Unreasonable Faith’s guide to Christian Clichés and Phrases.

Posted by Les on Wednesday, November 05, 2008 at 04:49 PM. Read 415 times. Tags: , ,
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Ever wondered what Christians really mean when they use their favorite catchphrases? Daniel Florien over at Unreasonable Faith translates for us. Here’s a sample:

“What can I pray for you about?”

Translation: “Any juicy tidbits about your life I can spread through the prayer gossip grapevine?”
Acceptable Response: “Thanks for asking. You’re so kind. My wife is having an affair, my brother is a drunk, and my dog can’t control his sexual desires.”
Unacceptable Response: “Have you ever kept a prayer journal to see if you get more unanswered prayers than answered ones, or if your unasked prayers get answered just as much?”

I giggled at more than a few of these.

Comments:

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boobies United States Posted on 11/06/2008 at 02:30 AM

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Totally unrelated, I just thought you’d all enjoy this one:

http://www.legorobotcomics.com/?id=14

Flour United States Posted on 11/06/2008 at 08:43 AM

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very good stuff. i especially like the comments. this one will stay with me for the day .... “My religious experience wasn’t all that horrible. It was pretty usual. And it was better than many — I mean I was never molested or anything…”

Stormin Norman United States Posted on 11/06/2008 at 08:44 AM

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I’ve always chuckled at “He is risen.”
Shouldn’t “He has risen” be the grammatically correct way to refer to something in the past tense? Or “He is rising” if in the present tense?

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“How did the nation that once repudiated aristocracy and celebrated meritocracy become a place where financial gains were privatized while financial losses were socialized?” —Despair, Inc.

zilch Austria Posted on 11/06/2008 at 01:06 PM

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Norman- “He is risen” is now archaic, but it used to be correct in English.  They still say “Er ist erstanden” in German, not “Er hat erstanden”.  That applies to many verbs of motion in German: er ist geschwommen, er ist gegangen: he has swum, he has gone (walked).  I wonder if the same was true in English… any Middle English freaks in the house?

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You were born.  And so you’re free.  So happy birthday.
- Laurie Anderson

batteriesnotincluded Great Britain (UK) Posted on 11/06/2008 at 03:21 PM

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Its quite probable that some middle english would be constructed like German, particularly words derived from the Saxon influx about the year 500 Common Era

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Fine words! I wonder where you stole them. (Jonathan Swift)

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