Swedish hospital asks Jesus to change his name.

Posted by Les on Thursday, March 23, 2006 at 01:13 PM. Read 942 times. Tags:
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I know times are rough, but how bad are they when the Christian savior himself has taken on a nursing job in a Stockholm hospital? Not only that, but the ungrateful bastards he’s working for have asked him to change his name because it was scaring patients:

According to Jesus, an auxiliary nurse at Huddinge hospital, his superiors were worried that patients told “Jesus will be coming soon,” might get the wrong idea.

What? They thought he was having sex or something?

“If they thought that Jesus was coming they might believe that they were already dead,” the nurse told The Local.

OH! Oh, I’m sorry. I totally misunderstood what the problem was. My bad.

Jesus, who will now use his middle name Manuel, said he didn’t have a problem with the change.

“I understand why they wanted me to use my middle name,” he said.

But, he added, “my name never usually causes me problems.”

Hell, I bet it gets him the best seat in the restaurant. He probably makes a killing selling t-shirts that read “JESUS GAVE ME A SPONGE BATH AND ALL I GOT WAS THIS LOUSY T-SHIRT!”

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Deemdee Thailand Posted on 03/23/2006 at 07:26 PM

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No surpise.  If my memory serves me correctly Sweden some years ago decided that urinals in the men’s rooms were sexist and had them removed.

In this case maybe they are being “ethnist"(?) - Jesus in this gentlman’s (Jesus Manuael)spoken tongue is pronounced Haysoos.  A little adjustment on their part would have worked . . . . . but nooooo . . .

tim gueguen Canada Posted on 03/23/2006 at 08:48 PM

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Funny, but it doesn’t seem to be a problem in those parts of the world where Jesus is a common male first name.

Brock United States Posted on 03/24/2006 at 05:43 AM

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According to Jesus, an auxiliary nurse at Huddinge hospital, his superiors were worried that patients told “Jesus will be coming soon,� might get the wrong idea.

What? They thought he was having sex or something?

“If they thought that Jesus was coming they might believe that they were already dead,â€? the nurse told The Local.

OH! Oh, I’m sorry. I totally misunderstood what the problem was. My bad.

Don’t worry, Les. I grok how you could have misunderstand:

I once heard a TV evangelist holler “Come in Jesus!” and it took me a moment to understand what he was actually advocating.

“Come in, Jesus!”: Acceptable to most.

“Come in Jesus!”: If you do, you’ve earned your bragging rights, dude, but please, keep them to yourself. And I hope you used a condom, for Christ’s sake!

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“At six I was left an orphan.  What the hell is a six year old supposed to do with an orphan?”
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Les United States Posted on 03/24/2006 at 08:13 AM

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Brock! Been wondering where you’d disappeared to lately. Good to see you’re back.

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When one reads Bibles, one is less surprised at what the Deity knows than at what He doesn’t know.
-- Mark Twain

Brock United States Posted on 03/24/2006 at 04:57 PM

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Thanks, Les. It’s good to BE back.

Surprisingly I’m still wondering where David is...or Mild Bill for that matter.

Ah, the memories. So many people were here that I’d like to see here again…

I just might have to hit the archives.

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“At six I was left an orphan.  What the hell is a six year old supposed to do with an orphan?”
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elwedriddsche United States Posted on 03/24/2006 at 06:57 PM

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David dropped enough hints way back when to find him if one really wanted. For that matter, his email address may still be valid.

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Science is answers that must always be questioned.
Philosophy is questions that may never be answered.
Religion is answers that must never be questioned.
Politics is answers that lobbyists pay for.

Sadie Jane United States Posted on 03/25/2006 at 09:28 PM

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I would have expected better from the Swedes. wink

Come to think of it, where has Nunyabiz been? How about Jeffercine? Xxena? Justin? Any others?

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There’s still time to change the road you’re on.

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