Stupid Evil Bastard: Jesus shows up in a tree log needing a haircut.

Jesus shows up in a tree log needing a haircut.

Posted by Les on Tuesday, February 12, 2008 at 02:32 PM. Read 786 times. Tags: jesus sightings, pareidolia, religion, true believers

The overly credulous are finding Jesus in a tree again. Which I suppose is normal considering that he was once nailed to one:

MyFox Colorado | Jesus Image Found in Tree Log

A Bensalem, Pa., furniture maker says he’s found a holy item and he’s been taking care of it religiously. Craig O’Connor has a block of wood that he chopped from a pine tree. On it, is an image of a Jesus-like figure with its arms outstretched. The tree rings form a kind of halo around the figure’s head.

“I was just covered in goose bumps,” said O’Connor as he reminisced about his find. He had been helping out a friend, chopping trees in Burlington County nearly a year ago when he came upon the image. O’Connor said it looked like “Jesus ascending to heaven. Take me, thats what it looks like to me. It’s a natural stain, a natural sap stain.”

It’s not the only natural “sap stain” in this story either. Of course, like all of the other saps that find these supposedly divine images, there’s a message here:

By counting the tree rings, O’Connor believes the tree was at least 40-50 years old. As a furniture maker of 25 years, O’Connor has worked with wood and seen plenty of different stains and marks. He says this one is radically different from all the others. O’Connor is a Catholic and believes it’s a sign from God. When asked what the message is, he replied that it’s like Jesus saying, “Believe in me. I’m still here. Have faith in me.”

Actually what he’s saying is: “HELP ME! I’M STUCK IN A FRIGGIN’ TREE!!”

O’Connor says finding the image has helped his faith. He goes to church about 3-4 times a month and says he’s become a better person, less quick to become angry.

Wow, three to four times a month! Better slow down there, dude! Don’t want to over-exert that newly refreshed faith you just got! Imagine how many times he’d go to church in a month if he found Jesus in a bagel or, better yet, in a water stain on the bathroom wall!

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Comments:

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Ryan Egesdahl

Posted on 02/12/2008 at 02:59 PM

This is your brain on pareidolia. I’m just wondering what the hell the number of tree rings has to do with the price of tea in China, really.

Webs

Posted on 02/12/2008 at 03:03 PM

“HELP ME! I’M STUCK IN A FRIGGIN’ TREE!!”

Okay… that made it really hard not to bust out laughing in the middle of work!

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Moloch

Posted on 02/12/2008 at 03:07 PM

Fucking Colorado news site as well....

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zilch

Posted on 02/12/2008 at 03:53 PM

I have to admit, this is more impressive than your average Virgin Mary in a head of lettuce. Maybe Jesus is the Truth after all! Nah…

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m.wael alkel

Posted on 02/12/2008 at 03:53 PM

guys since you mentioned jesus what do you think of this
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QaKP4WfG3F4
priceless lol

Ragman

Posted on 02/12/2008 at 04:50 PM

It looks NOTHING like Jesus. It’s Stevie Nicks - watch her video for “Stand Back” and you’ll see.

Neil

Posted on 02/12/2008 at 05:02 PM

Fer God’s sake, no! That’s not Jesus Christ! It’s....It’s THE BANSHEE!
The Banshee’s cry is even represented by cool special lumber effects of radiating doom coming from her head.
Or maybe the tree was a Crystal Gayle fan.

I really don’t see Jesus there though, unless maybe we’re talking about 1970’s super-hippie Jesus that played lead guitar for the Allman Brothers for a few months.

chief

Posted on 02/12/2008 at 05:03 PM

Actually what he’s saying is: “HELP ME! I’M STUCK IN A FRIGGIN’ TREE!!”

Actually after comparing the pose in the tree with the following image, I’d have to say that it actually looks like Jesus is “gettin’ jiggy with it.”

Last_Hussar

Posted on 02/12/2008 at 06:24 PM

At least that one is humanoid, though I’m seeing more Alien Bug in disguise

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Black Dahlia

Posted on 02/12/2008 at 06:53 PM

Looks gay. Is he modeling a new robe or something?

m.wael alkel

Posted on 02/12/2008 at 06:55 PM

speaking of aliens i made a presentation about electronic evolution today in college (programs that learn and debug it self) and because i had a biological introduction out of 86 people who were there , 3 students sent me ‘god will make bbq out of you in hell’ emails but the funniest one is an e mail that says that i am a reptile alien and i am a part o an evil conspiracy and that they know all about us (crocodile aliens) and they wont let their plant and their Jesus get destroyed by the filthy satanic claws of ours.
i might look like big foot but not a reptile alien lol.

leguru

Posted on 02/12/2008 at 07:09 PM

HA, HA, HA. This is the kind of idiocy that first brought me to SEB, looking for “images” and how easily the booboise is fooled. If this is an example of how someone completely changes their life and the way they relate to other human beings, it’s no wonder there are so many “religions” on the planet. How about finding out what makes your neighbor feel happy and promoting whatever that is, providing it does not harm another? Don’t some religions teach “compassion”??? Where is compassion in pareidolia? This is pure selfish gratification - mental masterbation, if you will. As Julia Childs said, “No fat, no flavor, no thanks.”

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DaBroad

Posted on 02/12/2008 at 07:20 PM

I don’t know. Looks like he’s tap dancing. Jesus, the Musical. Christ on Ice.

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caddon

Posted on 02/12/2008 at 08:09 PM

Looks more like some kind of crazy mushroom.

QueenMillefiori

Posted on 02/12/2008 at 10:09 PM

Looks like Gandalf to me.

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Sycanman

Posted on 02/12/2008 at 11:04 PM

I don’t know. Looks like he’s tap dancing. Jesus, the Musical. Christ on Ice.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GVL656my8Sc”

zilch

Posted on 02/13/2008 at 02:16 AM

m.wael alkel- are you sure you’re not a reptile alien? How do you know? Can you prove it?

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m.wael alkel

Posted on 02/13/2008 at 04:02 AM

zilch please don’t mess with this issue , i can post you my DNA analsys that has 46 chromosomes and it is a human genome by all standards , their only evidence is that i don’t believe in the god fairy tail and a little glitch in some ones phone camera.
my god that video is going around college from phone to phone and they call it the fat reptilian.
guys I am as human as you are , i eat , i drink and most importantly i can hurt people for the seck of emotions and not food.
plus if i was a reptile wouldn’t i have to lay down in the sun for hours (i hate sun bathing like hell).
where is my claws , how can alter my skin shape to make it look and feel soft.
and even if i was an alien why would i want to destroy you pathetic planet , if you are already doing it your self.

zilch

Posted on 02/13/2008 at 04:27 AM

Okay, m.wael alkel, you’re probably not an alien reptile. But now I’m worried: I do like sunbathing. Could I be an alien reptile without knowing it? I’ve never done a DNA analysis on myself, and sometimes I do feel like destroying this pathetic planet, or at least some of the pathetic humans on it.

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You were born. And so you’re free. So happy birthday.
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m.wael alkel

Posted on 02/13/2008 at 05:12 AM

destroy some of the pathetic humans on it

thats also every single human being dream as well but you have to define who.

Could I be an alien reptile without knowing it?

well check if your wife/girlfriend lays eggs in the size of a ball.
if you are then call on for your mothership to pick me up , i ev had enough of this shitty planet so bail me out and ill serve your advanced specie for ever.

decrepitoldfool

Posted on 02/13/2008 at 08:24 AM