I’ve found Jesus. He was behind the sofa the whole time!
I’ve found Jesus!
Posted by moses on Tuesday, April 12, 2005 at 08:56 AM. Read 789 times. Tags: humor Permalink · 13 Comments ·
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Now it’s time to Find Jesus or pay in hell!
Thanks, Normal Bob Smith! 
ingolfson 
Posted on 04/12/2005 at 04:12 PM
Posted on 04/12/2005 at 04:12 PM 
The short version: I loled.
Brock 
Posted on 04/12/2005 at 04:45 PM
Posted on 04/12/2005 at 04:45 PM 
Lucky you, Moses. Not me. I even hired a private detective and still, Jesus wasn’t found. I just assumed he’d been bumped off.
Talking Soup Posted on 04/12/2005 at 06:40 PM
Posted on 04/12/2005 at 06:40 PM 
I know I have him in a jar somewhere…
Consigliere Posted on 04/13/2005 at 12:11 AM
Posted on 04/13/2005 at 12:11 AM 
Brock:
Your dick has lead you astray. I urge you to seek a refund of any fee you may have paid.
leguru Posted on 04/13/2005 at 12:12 AM
Posted on 04/13/2005 at 12:12 AM 
I found him at a bar. Drunk outside asked me if I would buy him a drink if he could prove he was Jesus Christ. I was intrigued and said, “Sure!”
We walked inside together and the bartender looked at him and cried, “Jesus Christ! Are you here again?” 
Brock Posted on 04/13/2005 at 01:50 AM
Posted on 04/13/2005 at 01:50 AM
Brock:
Your dick has lead you astray. I urge you to seek a refund of any fee you may have paid.
Hee hee. Yeah but he’s a private dick and he works for free…
marcythewhore Posted on 04/18/2005 at 11:44 AM
Posted on 04/18/2005 at 11:44 AM 
Friday, April 15, 2005
In case you are looking for your favorite demon on the world map, here’s a Demon Locator:
posted by marcythewhore at 7:21 AM 0 comments
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Last time I lost track of him it turned out he had fallen down behind the fridge. It was months before I finally figured out where he was and boy had the dust bunnies had fun with him by then! Before that it was behind the TV set. I swear the man can’t stay out from behind the furniture if his life depended on it.
Then again, considering how he was treated previously while visiting the planet, perhaps he’s hiding behind furniture on purpose. I know I often end up cowering behind the sofa when confronted by some of his followers.