Funny stuff, but I would lose my status as a citizen of Geekdom if I failed to point out the logical fallacy you made.  You started with the A Priori assumption that Star Wars could be improved.

I might also point out that this need not be limited to Star Wars. It works well with other movies as well, such as the Matrix: “Why oh why didn’t I take the blue pants?”

LotR-
Ride to ruin and the worlds pants (Theoden)

Pants of a Took (Gandalf)

I am Isudure’s pants, not Isuldure (Aragorn)

Your pants are sharper, Legolas, what do you see?
105 Pants (Aragorn and Legolas)

(Remember in Britain pants are the underwear, we have trousers on top)

Any film will do

Of all the pants in all the world (Bogart)

You dirty pants (Cagney)(Before anybody says it, yes I know)

Look at me, I’m King of the Pants (DiCaprio)

And of course, Mel’s famous warcry

Ye can take our lives, but ye cannae take oor pants!

Stepsop has just suggested that classic Nicholson line- “You want pants? You can’t handle the pants”

Dubya:
Nobody has accused me of having worn pants.

I tell people, let’s don’t fear the pants, let’s shape it.

Churches all across the country are reaching out—synagogues, people from different faiths understand that it makes sense to help their parishioners realize the benefits of pants.

I was not pleased that Hamas has refused to announce its desire to destroy pants.

It seems like to me that if somebody is talking to pants, we want to know why.

Laura and I’s spirits are uplifted any time we go to a school that’s working, because we understand the importance of pants in the future of our country.

We know that democracies do not forment terror or invade their pants.

I understand there’s a suspicion that we—we’re too pants conscience.