AN OPEN LETTER TO THE SOUTH
by The Bo$$
I’d like to do a Peter Fredson-style article on how I feel about the South…
I think the Southern States (Georgia, Florida, Alabama, Mississippi, Louisiana, & Texas) need to realise a few things:
- ‘Most’ is not a synonym for ‘all’, as in ‘most people believe in God’ != ‘all people believe in God’
- Scientific theory != Cockamamie theory
- Just because you think something is the right thing to do does not give you the power to blow past authority and do it anyway, as with the Terry Schaivo case and the Iraq War
- Muslims != Terrorists
- The Bible is not meant to be taken as fact
Also, stop the whole forcing religious beliefs down everyone’s throats via Intelligent Design. ‘But I don’t need no edumacation; I get it from the Bible’, you say. That’s why you lost the civil war.
In conclusion, get with the 21st century. It’s nice here. You’ll be happier.



















Sadly, Brandi, it’s just stupid enough to sound plausible.