It’s only a matter of time…

By , on 21 May, 2012

 

 

6 comments   Humor   , ,  

Pastor busted for recording video of female parishioners using church bathrooms.

By , on 17 May, 2012

Pervert Pastor pissed at being pinched.

55-year-old Robert Lyzenga is a naughty Pastor.  Seems he felt God needed some help keeping on eye on the female members of the Sunrise Christian Reform Church so he took it upon himself to install “air fresheners” on the stall doors of the women’s restroom.

No one thought much of it until one of them fell off while a lady was taking care of business. When she picked it up she noticed that there was some form of camera in the spot where the nicely smelling insert normally goes:

Cops: Pastor Hid Cameras In Church Bathroom | The Smoking Gun.

A review of memory cards removed from the purported air fresheners showed that they contained footage of two adult women and a female juvenile “using the restroom.” A church worker told cops the air fresheners first appeared in the stalls in February, raising the possibility that many other women were videotaped (and the footage was downloaded from the hidden cameras).

Lyzenga was busted after footage from one of the cameras showing someone putting it together in an office area was matched up with things in his own office such as the Superman mouse pad on his desk. The married father of three was fired immediately after his arrest and is awaiting trial.

I’m less surprised that the good Pastor has gone astray than I am with the means he took in doing so. I’ve never understood how someone could find watching anyone use the bathroom to be sexy.

One comment   Religion   , , , ,  

Minority births have surpassed White births for the first time.

By , on 17 May, 2012

Here’s news that’s sure to piss off our resident bigot. For the first time in American history the number of minority babies being born has surpassed the number of white babies being born:

Census – Minorities Now Surpass Whites in US Births – NYTimes.com

“This is an important landmark,” said Roderick Harrison, a former chief of racial statistics at the Census Bureau who is now a sociologist at Howard University. “This generation is growing up much more accustomed to diversity than its elders.”

[...] Minorities made up roughly 2.02 million, or 50.4 percent of U.S. births in the 12-month period ending July 2011. That compares with 37 percent in 1990.

In all, 348 of the nation’s 3,143 counties, or 1 in 9, have minority populations across all age groups that total more than 50 percent. In a sign of future U.S. race and ethnic change, the number of counties reaching the tipping point increases to more than 690, or nearly 1 in 4, when looking only at the under age 5 population.

It’s only a matter of time now until whites are in the minority. You can bet there’s going to be more turmoil as that day approaches as the racists and bigots get all riled up about it. I have a feeling they will not go softly into that dark night.

The day it does happen is well into the future. Previous predictions pegged the year 2040 as the tipping point, but the census data shows that rates of minority immigration are also on the decline which may push that date a bit further into the future. Still, it’s coming and will probably bring a storm along with it.

Leave a comment   Politics   , ,  

Too Much Faith Will Make You Crazy: High School Teacher edition.

By , on 16 May, 2012

Kids at San Benito’s Veterans Memorial High School got one hell of lecture from their teacher the other day. It seems she has all manner of… interesting beliefs about Jesus, Mary Magdalene, the coming apocalypse, and aliens:

San Benito Teacher Replaced After Bizarre Classroom Rant About Jesus, Mary Magdalene, UFOs & The Apocalypse – Houston News.

Before the teacher was done, she told a roomful of alternately jeering and frightened public school students that Jesus Christ impregnated Mary Magdalene just before his crucifixion. Then she switched to Spanish and over the objections of her students, elaborated at great length on her beliefs.

She told the class that Jesus fell in love with Mary Magdalene when he was 12. They met while he was piloting a boat across the sea. Mary was on the shore, weeping after a bad breakup, the teacher continued, and Jesus saw her and invited her aboard. Mary soon fell in love with Jesus’ eyes, and he kissed her. After that, she says, they were seen together at parks and parties, according to a bilingual commenter’s line-by-line translation at valleycentral.com.

[...] She said that an army of God was coming to destroy this world on December 21, 2012, but not to worry, because Jesus had created another planet that was more beautiful than this one, a Utopia full of waterfalls where everybody was always 25 years old, where money does not exist, but Christmas does, complete with Santa Claus.

And it just keeps getting better from there. Go read the full article for the rest of her claims.

The school has yanked the teacher from her position and replaced her with a sub for the rest of the year. They’re claiming that this is all the result of a bad reaction she had to some of he medication, but it sounds more like she needs to be medicated. The thing is, this isn’t the first time she’s made such proclamations and when asked by a reporter why she said these things her reply was “Because it’s true.” They followed up with her husband who would only say that his wife likes teaching and keep your fucking nose out of our business.

Based on the YouTube video (embedded below)  one of her students made of her outburst, I’m inclined to think she believes every word of it. And, again, I have to point out that from an atheistic standpoint I’ve got as much reason to believer her claims as I do any other Christian. Who’s to say that Jesus hasn’t been in contact with her and plans to marry her and bring an army of UFOs this coming December? Nothing she said is all that much more outrageous that a lot of stuff you’ll find in the Bible. Given an all powerful yet mysterious God who does things we struggle to understand it’s hard to see how we can question any of the claims she makes. Yet I bet most Christians will say she’s clearly delusional and talking nonsense without the slightest whiff of self-awareness in doing so.

Continue reading Too Much Faith Will Make You Crazy: High School Teacher edition. »

8 comments   Religion   ,  

Friends help you move. Real friends grant your request for them to shoot you.

By , on 16 May, 2012

Pic of hurr dog.They say curiosity killed the cat and it’s true that too much inquisitiveness can be deadly, or at least very very painful. One young man with more curiosity than common sense decided he wanted to know what it felt like to be shot with a gun.

So he pestered his best friend until the friend finally complied:

Cops: NY man shoots friend in leg at his request – Yahoo! News.

State police in St. Lawrence County say the shooting occurred around 5 p.m. Sunday in the rural town of Stockholm when 25-year-old Shawn Mossow of neighboring Norfolk relented to his friend’s repeated requests and shot him once in the right leg with a .22-caliber rifle.

Normally I’m all about encouraging a healthy sense of curiosity, but the key word is “healthy”. There are some things in life that you probably don’t really need to experience if you can at all avoid it and being shot with a gun is one of those things. I can tell you what it feels like even though I’ve never been shot myself:

It really hurts. Even worse than that time you stubbed your pinkie toe in the dark while trying to walk from your bedroom to the bathroom with a massive hangover and ended up pissing all over yourself and the floor while screaming obscenities that would make a sailor blush. It’s the kind of pain that you really don’t want to know first hand. Or so I’ve been told because, as I said, I’ve never actually been shot myself.

Turns out all’s well that ends well. The shootee is in the hospital expected to make a full recovery and the shooter is in jail for reckless endangerment and hoping that the shootee is a good enough friend to loan him the 10K he needs to make bail.

2 comments   Stupidity in Action   , ,  

Those who fail to learn from history…

By , on 14 May, 2012

15 comments   Politics   , ,  

Dumbass counterfeiter wants to be on “Hardcore Pawn” so badly he gets himself busted.

By , on 11 May, 2012

Pic of Charlie Brown.

I'm right there with you on that one, Chuck.

Some folks will do anything for their brief moment in the spotlight. Take for example Detroit area counterfeiter Kenny “Boom” Smith who is a big fan of the reality show Hardcore Pawn which is filmed in Detroit at American Jewelry and Loan. He wanted to be on the show soooo badly that he offered to sell Les Gold, the owner and star, his counterfeit making machine and a bunch of counterfeit money:

So Gold didn’t bat an eyelash when Smith showed up and wanted to sell him his counterfeit money and machine. He wanted to be on the show. Smith told Gold he would bring his counterfeiting equipment to the store. A short time later the Secret Service showed up at American Jewelry and Loan. They had been tracing Smith’s activities since he had been passing his fake bills.

Gold filled them in on what Smith had told him and the agents found out Smith’s counterfeiting claims had been captured on camera for the show.

So now, Smith has been busted by the Secret Service and charged in federal court. This isn’t his first counterfeiting case either. He has done a stint in prison for the same thing and if convicted he is going back again.

As Gold says, “All because he wanted his five minutes of fame on TV.”

via Counterfeiter caught selling to famous Detroit pawn shop of ‘Hardcore Pawn’ | News – Home.

Obviously Mr. Smith isn’t the brightest bulb, but his quest for TV infamy still prompts a couple of questions. What, exactly, did he expect the pawn shop to do with the phony money? Sell it as a novelty? REAL FAKE MONEY! FOOL YOUR FRIENDS! GET YOUR ENEMIES ARRESTED!  Did he not understand that he was being filmed admitting to a crime? He signed the waiver allowing them to use the footage on the show and it’s not like they use hidden cameras. Did he just think it wouldn’t be admissible in court?

If nothing else I suppose he deserves credit for putting his own stupid add back into a jail cell. That’s one less source of fake money doing business in Detroit.

2 comments   Stupidity in Action   , , , ,  

New Mayan discovery shows they didn’t think world would end this year.

By , on 11 May, 2012

I’ve said before that the only thing you can conclude about the Mayan calendar stopping on December 21st, 2012 is that it is time to get a new Mayan calendar. Yet there are still plenty of people out there who cling to the idea that it’s significant in establishing when the world will end.

Now archaeologists have found new evidence that the Mayans certainly didn’t think the world would end at that time after discovering a mural in the ancient city Xultún which included dates stretching well past the end of the calendar everyone is so worked up about:

Unprecedented Maya Mural Found, Contradicts 2012 “Doomsday” Myth

One is a lunar table, and the other is a “ring number”—something previously known only from much later Maya books, where it was used as part of a backward calculation in establishing a base date for planetary cycles. Nearby is a sequence of numbered intervals corresponding to key calendrical and planetary cycles.

The calculations include dates some 7,000 years in the future, adding to evidence against the idea that the Maya thought the world would end in 2012—a modern myth inspired by an ancient calendar that depicts time starting over this year.

“We keep looking for endings,” expedition leader Saturno said in a statement. “The Maya were looking for a guarantee that nothing would change. It’s an entirely different mindset.”

There you go. Clear evidence the Mayans thought the world would continue on past the end of the calendar they were using. Can we please put this stupidity behind us now?

Probably not, but it was worth a shot.

2 comments   Science, Skepticism   , , ,  

The long delayed 8th SEB Podcast is now available!

By , on 8 May, 2012

A pic of a microphone.

Blah blah blah...

Yes! As promised, this past weekend saw ***Dave and I sitting down in front of our respective PCs and attempting to pontificate at length on various topics including many that you supplied us with. We talked politics touching on Mitt Romney’s apparent nomination, Paul Ryan’s general obnoxiousness, and David Barton’s twisting of history and how the Founding Fathers were not perfect beings who made no mistakes. We spoke of classical music and our short-lived time as musicians. We chattered on about how much the new movie The Avengers sucks. Endless erections caused by BMW motorcycles. The really bad sci-fi movie The Lawnmower Man. And we round out the conversation with discussing the movie trailers ***Dave saw before his viewing of The Avengers.

In all it’s an hour and 16 minutes of non-stop meandering where we manage to stay on topic… mostly. This is the original unedited recording. I had spent most of last night editing it up a bit, but on reviewing the work this evening I decided I didn’t like it. I wanted it to sound more like two guys having a conversation than a NPR-ish recording and so I decided to abandon the edits and I didn’t even bother trying to find music to put at the beginning. I’m not sure why, but this just felt better to me than all the usual edits and additions I have done in the past.

Plus, it was less work.

You can either listed to the podcast by using the player at the bottom of this entry or you can download it by clicking here so you can put it on your MP3 player of choice or copy it to a CD and then bury it in the backyard. As always, comments/criticisms/compliments/complaints can be left in the comments as you see fit. Once again ***Dave and I had a lot of fun doing this and we hope you’re at least as amused as we were.

Play

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

3 comments   Blogging   , ,  

Need topics for the missing 8th SEB Podcast!

By , on 4 May, 2012

A pic of a microphone.

Blah blah blah...

Seeing as it’s been several weeks since the original call for topics for the 8th SEB Podcast it’d probably be a good idea to solicit new ones for it now that ***Dave and I have managed to settle on doing it this Sunday.

So I am once again turning to you, dear readers, for your suggestions/questions/topics that you’d like to hear two middle-aged white guys pontificate about at length. We’ll chatter on about nearly anything regardless of how qualified or (more likely) not we are to say anything cogent about it.

Opinions are like assholes and we have a lot of them… wait… that doesn’t sound quite right.

Anyway, you can either leave your suggestions in the comments on this thread or email them to me by clicking here. We’ll be recording the podcast this Sunday! For reals this time! Most likely.

5 comments   Blogging   , ,  
 
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