Last Hussar:
The once was a young Mr.
Who spoke to a girl, and then Kr. (think about it)
She said ‘It was a fright
until I found out last night
It’s ok, he’s a Dr’

Zilch:
There once was a handsome young Mr.
Who spoke to a girl, and then Kr.
But then comes the Mrs.
She spits and she Hrs.
And the girl? Why, that Mrs. Dr.

Love ‘em.

Hussar!  Here’s a variant inspired by your limerick:

There once was a handsome young Mr.
Who spoke to a girl, and then Kr.
But then comes the Mrs.
She spits and she Hrs.
And the girl? Why, that Mrs. Dr.

Whats the plural of the following

Mouse
Louse
House
?
Why?

Why? For the very same reason that you have:
Maus/Mäuse
Haus/Häuser
Laus/Läuse

These are old forms which have survived into Modern English, where the grammatical change from singular to plural is indicated by an umlaut, that is, a change of the vowel to indicate grammatical change.  Many German plurals are still made this way, but English has discarded most of them for the more uniform “-s”, “-es” plural form, following the general trend of languages to evolve from having an initially simply inflected grammar, to highly inflected, and back to simply inflected again.  English is further along than German in this respect, probably due to its more eclectic evolution.

Usually he’s the one pushing me away.

I can’t imagine turning down sex with anyone I was in a relationship with.

I’m trying to write the longest first line that poetry ever had
For a start that wasn’t bad
Now here comes a longer oneeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
I know I cheated:
It was the only way I could avoid being defeated.

Any one know who did that?

One of my (irregular sounding)limericks

The once was a young Mr.
Who spoke to a girl, and then Kr. (think about it)
She said ‘It was a fright
until I found out last night
It’s ok,  he’s a Dr’

I love to play with the irregulaties like this.

Whats the plural of the following

Mouse
Louse
House
?

Why?
Also why isn’t the singular of dice, a douce?

“so, in other words,
I love you like you would love
me if I were you”

ouch. It went something like that. I don’t remember where I heard it. Never got over it though.

Nice, Sadie!  Those madcap hormones!  Here’s another haiku:

My haikus are bad.
But they do have one thing right:
The five-seven-five.

Zilch:

The limerick verse form, you see,
Epistemologically,
Is the sine qua non
The mot that is bon
Of polyglot perversity.

It’s cute—I especially dig the polysyllabic second line.

Lest we forget the venerable haiku, here’s my offering:

My head, how it aches.
My mate’s hormones rage madly
By my side, damn him.

Usually he’s the one pushing me away.

If you liked Sadie’s limericks, how about this one, courtesy of Daniel Dennett in Breaking the Spell:

There was a young lady of Tuck
Who had the most horrible luck
She went out in a punt
And fell over the front
And got bit on the leg by a duck.

An old English-major girlfriend of mine and I once had a friendly competition writing limericks.  Hers were much better than mine, which tended to the absurd.  One time, she challenged me to write a limerick with a line composed of only one word.  Here it is:

The limerick verse form, you see,
Epistemologically,
Is the sine qua non
The mot that is bon
Of polyglot perversity.

LH: I make no judgement on your sincerity.

Cool but, even if you did, it’s MY problem. I try to remember:
No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. Eleanor Roosevelt

I thought with all the warnings I was going to be offended. Not in the least.

Phew.

The caveat was there because I know writing poetry (no matter how good or bad) is a personal experience, and often a way of saying ‘This is me’.  Prose just doesn’t seem to work much of the time. I make no judgement on your sincerity.

LH: Noel is technically the better poet.

I know. Thanks for the comments/observations.
I thought with all the warnings I was going to be offended. Not in the least.

S-Sadie: There’s nothing in the world that is more tragic than suicide.

For the living, yes. But Noel, poor tortured soul, is at peace now.
I don’t how important/relevant it is but we were both there as Vietnam Veterans, learning about and ‘coming to terms’ with PTSD.

The past has no future
The present holds some,
But the past and the future to me are one.
My mind is in two worlds, which I have to overcome,
And to live in this world,
I must become one. ….. Noel. 

But life is for living so …